


Crawl out through the fallout, baby

by poiintless_writing



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Ace Sole Survivor, Agender Sole Survivor - Freeform, Fluff and Angst, It starts off kind of slow, Mostly Fluff, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, There won't be nsfw scenes, Violence, but there will be smooches, how do I even tag this, there will be a plot at some point
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-03-18
Packaged: 2018-05-11 12:49:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 28,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5627209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poiintless_writing/pseuds/poiintless_writing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When I first stepped foot out of that vault I honestly couldn't have told you what I expected for my future in this new wasteland I once called my home. But teaming up with some merc? Definitely not it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hoo boy, so this is my first piece of writing I've posted here and I hope you enjoy it! I decided to make the Sole Survivor agender because personally I view my own version of them as such but also it was so that any readers can hopefully see their own Sole Survivors in this fanfic. I figured that gendering them would make it less relatable to everyone. Anyway this is just a small chapter to get it started off, I'm going to try to make the others longer since I already have them somewhat written. Just to warn you though, I started it off in a completely different perspective to how the rest of the fanfic is going to go but I liked it so I decided not to change this chapter however all the others won't be written the same. Sorry!

 

 

When I first stepped foot out of that vault I honestly couldn't have told you what I expected in my future in this new wasteland I once called my home. But teaming up with some merc? Definitely not it.

In fact not even close. If I had any other choice I wouldv'e picked it over this but as it happened, I didn't. Trying to adjust to this new utterly barbaric lifestyle was certainly challenging at the best of times and while I'm no stranger to violence, travelling in the Commonwealth was just too damn risky alone. Plus the fact that my 'people skills' aren't necessarily brilliant so not many would willingly tag along without payment, apparently my sense of humour was too dark for most of the people I met to handle, and so that all leads to me forking over 200 caps, what the hell even is this currency, to get some gun for hire in a bar I happened to have stumbled across in a lovely little town called 'Goodneighbour'.

 

What would my dearly beloved say?

 

At first I have to admit the merc, MacCready, was a slight pain in the ass with his too-smart-for-his-own-good mouth and occasional complaints but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't amusing at times. Not to mention he's pretty damn good with that sniper rifle of his and has never failed to keep most of the heat off my back in those more prickly fights.

After seeing his skills first-hand I understood why his price was so high, not that I cared all too much after getting him to lower it a little bit. My 'people skills' may be terrible but my bartering is top notch. That and I know when a guy's desperate to get paid and can easily be taken advantage of.

For a while I'm pretty sure he regretted letting the price down but I, the generous boss, try to keep the looting fair and even so he doesn't have all too much to complain about. Of course he still complains, under his breath and probably thinking I can't hear, although only about small things like how shitty of a job I took or how the areas I force him to go to aren't places he apparently enjoys going to. All boring things.

He only loudly complains over the fact that I pick up so much 'crap' such as right now.

 

"Oh come on! Just leave it." he groans as I bend down to pick up yet another hot plate along with a screwdriver and a hammer. Just little things you can't afford to live without.

 

"Shut it Maccy, these are very important for the lives of all those minutemen back in Sanctuary or back at the Castle. Whichever needs them more." I reply easily having grown used to his whinging and wave the hammer in his face in a mock threatening way.

 

"Important. Sure." he deadpans, pushes the hammer out of his face. "Just as long I don't have to carry any of that worthless crap."

 

"'Course not. Where would you even get that idea from?" I wink at him, shoving them into my pockets temporarily. As soon as I have the chance I'll sneak them into one of his many pockets and he knows this. It's easier to do it this way than to go through the hassle of actually handing it to him and asking him to hold onto it. Okay maybe it isn't exactly _easier_ but it's certainly a lot more fun.

 

In the distance I hear the faint sound of a conversation and swiftly gesture to Mac to be quiet before he can say anymore. He obediently shuts his mouth, unholstering his weapon only when I do. We crouch silently towards the voices, find some cover to crouch behind but with a good view of the two raiders, and almost in unison pick up our rifles, wordlessly decide our targets and pull the trigger.

I can't help the cheerful laugh that passes my lips when my own targets head explodes.

 

"Now _that's_ what I call a confirmed kill." Cready agrees, equally as cheery.

 

It's fucked up but out here in the Commonwealth it's definitely the little things like exploding heads that really bring a smile to my face. Besides, those raiders deserved it.

After that it's the same routine as usual, we loot the bodies, get whatever it is we came in here for which was in this case a locket, split all the spoils 50/50 and get out. It's all too normal, this routine, it feels far too right.

There are nights, I have to admit, when It's my turn to keep watch I sit and question the person I've become, or if I've even changed. Maybe I've always been this sadistic, I simply never had the chance to let it out under societies rule. But.. when I hear the heartbroken father thank me for being so kind as to get back the locket of his recently deceased daughter I know that I haven't gone too far.

 

That evening I still have doubts about myself swirling through my mind as I trudge towards diamond city with Cready at my side.

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

"I don't get you, S" MacCready says suddenly a few days later over the campfire we set up. "Not one bit."

 

I shoot him a quisical look, urging him to explain. It's not normal for him to get into any sort of conversation with me, unless it's something to do with where we're going or why, and if he does it never lasts long. Sometimes I wish it would turn into a proper friendly conversation but then I need to remind myself that I hired him to protect me not to be friends with me. It would much sadder if it was the other way around.

The fact that he want's to talk now makes me worried.

 

He squints his eyes at me for a second before speaking again, "One second you're like every other merc, taking contracts and breaking into houses, stealing their shi- stuff. But the next.... the next it's like somehow in a split second you developed morals, a conscience even, and you'll defend anyone who's in trouble. Even if their not paying you for it you do it out of the goodness of your heart. And then you'll do crazy things like clear out a raiders nest just to get a memento of a dead kid to put father at rest.

I can't quite tell if you're one of the regular scum like me or a do-gooder with one heck of a nasty streak."

 

His honesty catches me off guard and I don't know exactly how to reply. I wasn't expecting to hear my own fears coming out of someone else's mouth but Creads isn't an idiot. He's observant so I should have seen it coming. He certainly has a point, I have blown someone up just for the fun of it but have yet to turn down a plead for help.

I search for words, if only for the sake of ridding this silence but none come to mind. At least his gaze turns back to the fire, watching the flames lick at the molerat meat we've had to turn to eating. A couple more tense moments of silence pass before I can open my mouth to talk. The words that come out aren't a suitable reply but they're all I can give him for now.

 

"I'm just trying to survive and adjust out here."

 

He stare's into my eyes, probably searching for any meaning behind my statement, and then nods.

 

"This looks about done." is all he says and removes the meat from the fire.

The slight strain in his voice tells me that there's more he want's to say however he's refraining from doing so.

I don't necessarily want to pry either so I instead busy myself with eating my.... 'dinner'while putting out the campfire. The sun hasn't set yet but when it does it'll be best not to attract anything with the light.

The air between us is tense, the quiet isn't unusual except this time it's different, the unspoken thoughts hanging over us, weighing down agonizingly.

For some reason I feel like I owe him an explanation for all of actions even more so than I think I deserve to know. Although no matter how hard I try to think of it I just.... don't know.

Before all of this, before the bomb fell, I was a respectable citizen. I came from a well-mannered family and led my life the same way. I hated all forms of violence for the most part and resented the war, even before I was forced to be a part of it. So how the fuck did I become like this? Could it be the shock? Possibly, there's supposed to have been some studies into how some shock can dramatically change who you are or something along those lines but... sometimes it's hard to wake up and not know who you are. Maybe that's why I wan't to think of an answer for MacCready, that way at least he can know who I am and I'll feel like, well, myself in some odd way.

 

The rest of the night continues without anymore conversation, only me saying that I'll take first watch to which he only mumbles a small acknowledgement get's into his own sleepingbag, back facing me. A horrible uneasy feeling forms in my stomach and I can't help but worry if one day the caps won't be good enough and he'll get another job leaving me alone.

Naturally he will, I'm only his boss.

Why does that bother me so much?

Why am I so worried about his leaving? If that happens I'll just talk to Preston, as his general he'll follow and help out. Or even Codsworth would tag along. It would take a bit of begging for Preston after what I did the last time- how was I to know he hated fat mans? besides all I wanted was to test it out- but he would.

I have alot of options, it's not a problem. I won't be alone.

 

So why does that not ease this feeling?

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, another chapter done and dusted~  
> As I said, this chapter and all the others are going to be in a different perspective to the first chapter. Really that chapter was more to show how the wasteland was effecting Sole and to maybe even contribute to the main plot?? OooOoooh. Anyway enough clearing all that up, here's the next chapter! I used the name Sole because it's apparently the sort of go to name for them. If anyone has any better suggestions feel free to tell me and I might edit it in to replace Sole with. I also used they/them pronouns so I hope it doesn't get too confusing at some points.  
> Thanks for reading!

Time drags on and night finally turns into day. Sole never did wake Mac up, deciding that they wouldn't be able to sleep anyway. Besides MacCready deserved a lie in for how good he was at watching Sole's back. However when the first signs of dawn begin to light up the Commonwealth Sole reaches over and breaks the tranquil silence shaking MacCready awake.

"Heeeey sleeping beauty," they sing quietly, "time to get uuup." 

MacCready groans and turns over in his sleeping bag to face Sole, his eyes widening slightly when he sits up and sees the sunlight instead of the expected darkness.  
"What the heck S? You never woke me up!" 

The genuine annoyance in his tone surprises Sole at first but they become offended and snap back, "Figured you could use the rest. A little bit of gratitude wouldn't go amiss."

"Sure thanks," he sounds slightly apologetic and Sole nods their head in acknowledgement, "just as long as I don't have to spend the day babysitting your as- you." 

Sole stands up from their crouching position next to Cready and smirks down at him over the way he tried to stop himself from swearing. They're not sure why he does it, they had brought it before and he had said it was to do with some sort of promise he had made to someone, however he never got into any of the details about it. Sole was always amused by how frustrated he became and couldn't help the smirk that manages to appear on their face, no matter the situation. Well it was either from the fact that they found it amusing or it was because they couldn't deny how much they enjoyed hearing the small sighs and grunts he made everytime he almost slipped it. Probably both.  
S isn't going to lie, you've really got to appreciate the little things in life.

"Well," Sole begins in a much more cheery voice to earlier, "if it does come down to that you'll have had enough sleep to, for once, do a good job at it. Doubtful that will be the case though, don't worry."

"For once?" 

Sole only scoffs and moves to role up their sleeping bag, Cready doing the same. A more comfortable silence befalls them again as they pack up their bags and check their equipment. Sole's relieved that things are seeming a bit more normal although at several different time they notice MacCready looking over towards them, eyebrows furrowed, but only for a split second before turning away again.  
Would that man ever speak his damn mind? Trying to get him to talk is like pulling teeth. You'd need a bloody crowbar just to get him to open up. The suspense is eating at Sole with every glance, waiting for him to speak. None of this is helping with that twisting feeling that lingers from the night before.

Fuck it, if he won't talk then they will.

"So Creads, yk'know we've got a pretty busy schedule today, gotta take a quick trip into Diamond City, clean up some loose ends there and then check out the nearby areas. Mostly a scavenging-clean-up kinda day so nothing too important but, just to point out, there are going to be some raiders or their equivalent around, so that means we'll be sure to get into some serious fights with them. Now, while the way you seem to be eyeing up my back so often is comforting since I know you've got me covered I'm only slightly worried about all the others who are also going to be staring at me. Through a scope. Hopefully with different intentions. So spit it out. What's on your mind?"

MacCeady averts his gaze down to the rifle in his hands, embarrassed. Sole has a fleeting thought that he should look embarrassed more often before reminding themselves that they need to be serious listening to his reply.

"It's nothing." he sighs, "Just keeping an eye on your exhaustion level considering you're apparently not going to."

Sole put on their best 'bullshit' face. MacCready's a good liar one of the best Sole has ever come across which is saying something nowadays, but never good enough for them not to be able to see through it. "Uh-huh." They say blandly, running a hand through their hair -god they need to see John when they make it to Diamond city. "Whatever, guess it's none of my business. Except.. well.. it is. Look does this have something to do with last night?"  
Maccy's hands stop fiddling with the masterpiece but he doesn't look up or say anything. His eyebrows still furrowed as though in thought.

"C'mon if there's something bothering you I would prefer if you just got it out instead of it potentially becoming a problem when you lose focus. So..?"

Another moment or two pass before his eyes snap up to meet Sole's. "I should probably apologize for that. What I said... It all came out more accusing than it was meant to." He seems uncomfortable, more so as though he's not used to saying sorry than he doesn't feel like he should be.

"Nah, I don't mind." Sole reassures him, "All I want to know is why it came up and what the problem is?"

Mac scratches the back of his neck and shrugs. "No problem per say, boss. I only want to be able to figure you out. Knowing who you are helps me decide whether or not I can trust you,"  
He slings the rifle over his shoulder and looks eagerly towards the ruins of what was once a great city. "As I said, no problem. So how about we get this show on the road, huh? I also have some business to attend to if we're stopping in Diamond city, it'll only take a second of course."

Sole puts a lot of effort into keeping their voice steady as they agree and begin bossing Cready around like an olden day sergeant. The sudden realisation that MacCready doesn't trust them has Sole hiding behind jokes and odd actions so as to not show how badly they're truly effecting by that news. It's been at least a few months since the duo began travelling together and Sole had never once doubted that they had anything less than mutual trust. Hearing otherwise was like a punch to the gut. it wasn't as though they expected him to have 100% trust but this?

Sole can see where Mac's coming from, they're unpredictable and eccentric yet calm and sophisticated, personality changing like the weather when that radiation storm rolls in for the sole purpose of fucking up your day. You'd have to be pretty gullible...  
At least now Sole knows why MacCready said what he did. 

They don't want to think about why it bothers them so much that he doesn't trust them, for some reason the thought worse than the fear they felt of him possibly leaving, instead they perish the thought and put all focus into beating their previous highscore of headshots in a day.

 

~~~~~~~~

 

"Aaaaaand..."-"guh!"-"37." Sole smiles widely as the satisfying feeling of the body hitting the floor limply vibrating through the ground faintly. Even If Sole hadn't been paying attention they probably would have felt it, that was one big guy.

"Only 37? Gonna have to try harder than that of you want to beat that highscore of yours, at the rate you're going at we'll be taking out raiders all night." MacCready teases.

"Uh-huh, Maccy, joke all you want but I hope you know that if you continue stealing my shots that I've specifically let you know I was going for then that's exactly how this is going to play out." Sole winks at him. 

" _Stealing_. Sure. If that's what you want to call my helpful services of keeping you going without bullet holes in your head, then fine by me." MacCready laughs and bends down to pick through the piles of dead bodies that have been left scattered around them. 

Sole doesn't have a valid reason for why they find themselves unmoving, standing back and watching Creads as he expertly searching for anything with value, and they definitely don't have a reason for the fond smile the happen to be in possession of. They're overall pleased with how the day turned out. Shortly after arriving in Diamond City MacCready and Sole had split up, him saying he needed to go and do whatever it was he needed to go and do. Sole hadn't asked about any details but when he left their side they became increasingly more worried about what it was he was up to however all worry drained away when only a few minutes had passed before he had returned. From then on it was normal routine again. Report back to some of the locals and get paid for the jobs they were hired to do, talk to Nick briefly to ask about any news and pick up a new case file to look into, and then finally the duo stocked up on supplies, ready to take on whatever the nearby gangs had to throw at them.

Whatever tension that lingered between them had disappeared completely as the day passed by and each raider or super mutant areas was cleared without any hitches. It was a pleasant change, in an odd way, being able to go back into the usual swing of mass murder. It was like the previous evening had never happened and Sole was more that happy to forget all about it. Sole's relationship with MacCready, if you could even call it that, was strictly business for the most part but if you were to describe in any other way it would be that they were very hesitant friends. The friendship itself being based around teasing and snide comments. And so whenever moments like this occur Sole has taken it to always be a good sign. 

Sole chuckles quietly to themselves, still smiling and feeling quite chuffed at how this whole affair turned out and regained focus having been lost in thought. The second they refocus they're instantly glad they had been watching MacCready as they spot a red dot dancing menacingly across his back.  
Without hesitation Sole runs over and tackles Mac away just in time as the sound of a gunshot pierces through the air. He makes a small grunt in either surprise or discomfort but Sole isn't paying enough attention to be able to tell which when they don't stop moving, grabbing their rifle lining up the shot easily with the bastard hiding on one of the roofs and fires a clean shot between the eyes. They watch as the body falls off the edge and splats onto the pavement, yet another addition to their collection.

"38." Sole huffs out, breathing heavily from the adrenaline still rushing through them. That was too damn close. They look down towards Cready, lying on his back on the ground still, and shoots them a carefree smile. "Maybe with you as bait I can get that number up to at least the 40's before sundown." 

MacCready's face is a bit red and Sole instantly becomes afraid that maybe they weren't fast enough and he was actually wounded. Although he doesn't appear to be in pain, and it seems more like he's flustered over something instead of anything else. There's a faint blush dusting over his cheeks, Sole can't help but note that it's a good look on him. That's when they notice the position they're currently in.   
After pushing Maccy out of the way they had dropped to their knees in order to aim before the raider could have time to reload and try again, they hadn't paid any attention to where exactly they were kneeling. Which just so happened to be over MacCready's thighs. 

Suddenly the blush made sense.

"Heh, bit of a role reversal but whatever, I'm done for it." Sole smirks as they move to get back on their feet, extending a hand to him. He takes it and clears his throat, blush still visible however sadly less so than earlier. 

"Uh.. thanks, for saving my life right there." he says, eyes focused on the fresh dead body. To anyone else he's look as though he's afraid, going through the whole 'life flashing before you eyes and it's actually kinda shitty' moment, but Sole knows him well enough by to know to tell when he's avoiding making eye contact with them but they keep their gaze trained amusedly on his face. He gets over it soon enough and with a sigh looks at Sole properly. "..Again." he adds.

 "No thanks necessary," Sole says holding up a hand, "Just doing my job as an upstanding citizen protecting those who help me kill a lot of people by killing a person... you know, on second thoughts maybe I don't actually need you." they joke, winking at him again.

"Hah, you're right. I might as well clear off and leave you be. It'll help you get that record up faster without me being around to steal your shots." MacCready joins in throwing a friendly glare towards them as they both go back to looting.

"Ahh but see, then who'd be carrying all my junk that I pick up? Or even act as bait for me?"

"Maybe.. let's see, Piper? No. Han- nah.... Dogmeat is too cute to be bait, if anything were to happen to them then the guilt would be unbearable. How about Codsworth? He might do it for you."

Sole let's out a short breath of air, like a mixture between laughter and a sigh at the genuine thought he's putting into this. "Nope, this is the precise reason why you're the one I've gotta have around with me. Besides, you're a much better shot than Codsworth."

"Ah so you're impressed aren't you?"

Sole scoffs, "Firstly Codsworth uses a flamethrower, accuracy isn't important."

"Oh c'mon. Admit it already. You are impressed."

Sole looks thoughtfully at Cready, letting out an exasperated sigh, but inspects him. They lift a hand to their chin and hum a little, they nod having made their decision. Cready rolls his eyes at Sole, amused by them. "Yeah alright, I'm a little impressed." 

"There, that wasn't so hard now, was it?"

Cready fixes all the junk in his backpack so it's more comfortable against his back, finally moving that pointy goddamn can out of his way and looks softly at his sniper rifle. "Picked up a rifle when I was ten and never looked back, figured it was smarter to shoot my enemies at a distance you know?" Sole too uses a sniper so they understand completely what he means.  
Honestly MacCready isn't sure why he's telling them this, it just feels like after how shitty he was yesterday and the fact that they just saved his life, Sole deserves to hear about his past. If They hadn't wanted to be told they made no indication of it, while they walked back to a settlement they had set up a while back Sole asked questions and listened intently to every word Cready said.  
The questions weren't too prying and so he didn't have any problem answering them all. 

The journey was peaceful, the areas already cleared, and he was able to tell them all about Little Lamplight, how he was Mayor at one time. He also spoke of the Capital Wasteland and mentioned the difficulty of getting merc jobs under the Brotherhoods rule. It felt nice being able to talk to someone, MacCready had realised, letting them know about you and Sole was more than pleased to hear all about his life and how DC was doing. Sole was almost proud, they know how rarely he speaks of himself to anyone let alone Sole and couldn't help but feel honoured that even if MacCready didn't trust them entirely, he still felt comfortable enough to tell them all of this.   
Something in Sole's chest felt tight at the thought of it but they dismissed it as being nothing more than hunger and exhaustion settling in after a long day of hunting and the adrenaline from earlier wearing off. 

However somehow, without Cready meaning to, the conversation turned sour when he spoke of the time he had spent running with the gunners. It wasn't something he usual shared with others, the whole association with a notoriously evil group tends to drive customers away, although Sole had already known that from the start when they walked in on the charming conversation he had with Winlock and Barnes. That said, once they were mentioned all of the other details spilled out before he could stop them. Mostly complaints of course.   
Sole continued to ask questions, trying to get as much information out of him as possible, but withheld any form of judgement. They agreed with him that it was a huge fucking mistake but didn't in any way try to lecture him or condemn him for his youthful naivety. In a strange way he was relieved that they didn't seem to think any less of him now, a weight he didn't even know was there lifting off of his shoulders.

At some point they both had stopped walking short 10 minutes of the settlement, some collapsed buildings creating a makeshift cover from the rain which had apparently begun without either noticing. There weren't too many clouds luckily and the sunset was still visible, orange rays shining through holes where windows or even floors once were.   
Sole in the past few months had gotten used to others asking for help but hadn't expecting there'd be a day anytime soon where Cready would be the one asking. He never specifically asked using the words "Will you help me?" but he sounded like he didn't quite know how to form the question.

He told Sole all about his problems with Winlock and Barnes , how they were making his life pretty difficult after he left, ruining his business for him. They were the reason he had let up so much when deciding on a price despite his initial "No negotiations." 

"Once a gunner, always a gunner I guess." he says bitterly 

Sole isn't entirely sure how to respond but they too know what it's like to fight with a group and to never truly leave them afterwards and so they nods in understanding. 

Cready sighs and runs a hand through his hair. "Uh..I hope I didn't bore you too much there, didn't mean to get into all that." He looks at Sole sheepishly, suddenly feeling self-concious when their vision is focused somewhere off into the distance in thought. Sole knows how to deal with problems and they think they might now a way to help Cready out as well. MacCready coughs awkwardly at the silence and gestures to the road, "Ready to carry on then bos-"

"Where are they?" Sole interrupts. Yes, if done right this could be a walk in the park as long as the area isn't too awkward to manoeuvre through.

"Where are who?"

"Winlock and Barnes, those two assholes. Where are they?"

"....Why do you want to know?"

"Why do you think? To invite them to a picnic obviously, the weathers supposed to be lovely tomorrow." They monotone. "No, they're a problem for you and you help me out with all my day to day shit so it's my turn to repay the favour." 

"You might be forgetting that you pay me to do this. You owe me nothing." 

"I'm offering my help! Jesus christ, take it or leave it." Sole laughs in disbelief at how difficult he's making this out to be.

"You'd really help me out? For the sake of it?"

"Of course I would Maccy. Why the hell wouldn't I?"

"I... I don't know." he confesses, confused by why they're willing to help him out with his gunner problem but he's sure as hell not prepared to turn down such an offer. "I think I might take you up on that, I could use the help doing this 'cause I won't be able on my own but with the two of us? It would be somewhat better." 

The sun sets faster and darkness begins to envelop everything as MacCready tells Sole all of the necessary information and locations as well as reminding them that they can change their mind whenever and he won't hold it against them. That earns him a punch in the arm for thinking Sole would ever leave him struggling and they promise to go there and wipe them all out as soon as the chance appears. 

 

Once the duo reach their destination darkness had taken over entirely however there were plenty of lights set up around the makeshift shacks that Sole has built for the settlers. Too exhausted to even think of doing anything more that evening Sole says a quick goodnight to MacCready and turns to head into the sleeping area and get some rest.

"Oh hey, Sole." Cready calls out, stopping them halfway up the stairs. The look over and raise their eyebrows to show that they're listening. 

"...." He sighs, opening his mouth and closing it again trying to find the words, he finally decides to only say,"Shame you didn't get to beat that record today, but there's always tomorrow right?" 

Sole smiles at him, "Damn right about that. See you in the morning Maccy."

"See you in the morning Boss." 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter after this might take a while to come out, I'm a pretty bad procrastinator and I've also got school and such taking up my time so bare with me please. Thanks again for reading this, it means a lot and I hope you're enjoying it!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man this took way longer than it was meant to. Oops.  
> Well anyway, here's the next chapter!  
> Thank you to everyone who reads this and I hope you enjoy it.

For the first time in a while Sole wakes up feeling well rested and stretches while yawning. They vaguely remember a dream they had, fighting a super mutant-deathclaw hybrid. It was back in their neighbourhood before the bombs had fallen. The details are already slipping away from Sole but they think that MacCready was with them, helping to take down the tremendous beast. God they love dreams.

Sole swiftly jumps out of beds, careful not to wake the others who were in the sleeping area and makes their way down to the campfire. They skipped out on dinner yesterday since they were so exhausted and are paying for it now, their stomach growling loudly as the scent of molerat meat that's already being cooked fills their nostrils. Sole has to squeeze their way past two buildings in order to get to it and they curse their shitty skills and lack of hindsight.

Once they finally make it through they're surprised by who they see sitting in front of the campfire getting breakfast. Their back is turned to Sole and they consider sneaking up and scaring them but decide against it As much fun as it would be Sole enjoys being alive.

"You're up early." Sole says.

Cready turns around, "Couldn't sleep."

Sole hums and gestures to the seats surrounding the fire, "Can I?"

"Go for it."

Sole sits down opposite MacCready and reaches into their own backback pulling out some radstag meat they had gotten for themselves. In their opinion it was the nicest tasting meat they had tried, although a bit chewy. Cready said before that he wasn't a fan of it and so Sole rarely ate it instead finding food that they both would somewhat enjoy eating.  
Mornings still feel strange to Sole with the absence of birds singing. It seems empty almost without it. They attempt to fill the emptiness by humming a tune while cooking breakfast. It's a nice day, the sky is clear and there's only a slight breeze. Not too hot and not too cold, the perfect day for travelling since they don't need to bundle up and carry any extra clothing other than a jacket in case it starts to rain.

 

"So what's the plan for today, boss?" Cready asks, taking away his cooked meal. Sole notices the very slightest bit of anticipation in his voices.

They continue humming for a moment longer before finally saying, "Not sure yet. Thinking maybe we could take a slow day for once, maybe even head on in to Diamond city and check out what's what. There is that interview Piper wanted me to do for her afterall, about time I finally get around to it." They turn over the radstag meat. "So basically you can do whatever you want for today, no need to follow me around if you don't want to."

MacCready nods his head, "I'll probably come along with you into the city if that's alright. Been a while since I've had the chance to sit down and have a cold drink."

"Isn't it a bit early to start drinking?" Sole asks. Silently relieved to have his company even if for a short while. The less time they have to spend by themselves the better, they think.

"'Course not." he replies, smirking at them. Sole shakes their head in disapproval however the smile tugging at their lips betrays them.

"What's the deal with that interview anyway? Is Piper really that desperate for a story that she's asking anyone to do an interview with her or what? Last I checked she was exposing the possibility of the mayor being a synth."

"Oh y'know. She just want's me to answer some questions of hers, nothing big really."

"That's what an interview is alright." he says sarcastically, "If you don't want to tell me what it's about then that's okay. I'm not gonna pry." Cready adds the last part in sincerely.

Sole... well they never got around to telling Cready that when they had said that they were 'born and raised'

out here in Boston they meant that they were born and raised _200 years ago_ out here in Boston. They also never told him about Shaun. Sole realises that MacCready actually knows very little about Sole and vice versa. It's not really subjects that come up in conversation and at the time it was easier to leave out some... small details when he had asked about their past. That being said Cready isn't open at all about his past, the most he had ever told them was last night.

Sole wonders if maybe they should just tell him, it might be a small bit awkward to say but he's friends with Hancock and Daisy who are ghouls, Daisy being alive pre-war just like Sole so it shouldn't be all that odd of a thing to admit. It would easy enough to say, " _Oh hey by the way, that interview? Yeah it's asking what the whole vault ordeal was like. Did I mention I was in a vault? What's that? But I said I was living in sactuary hills and even pointed out my house? I was. I went into that vault about 200 years ago! Did I also mention I'm around 230 something years old? Haha yeah, must've forgot to say it. Oh and Piper wants to ask about my missing kid. I have a kid by the way, his names Shaun and he was kidnapped when we were in the vault and my spouse was shot and-"_ Yeah no. Fuck that.

 

"If you're so curious about it then you'll just have to wait until the paper is printed, won't you?" Sole winks at him. He can read all about it himself later, no need to drop all of those bombs on him right now.

Cready shoots Sole a suspicious look, and shrugs.

The rest of the meal passes without anymore conversation. Cready of course finishes first and Sole expects him to dismiss himself but is pleases when he stays, watching the few clouds in the sky pass by. Soon enough most of the others wake up too and come over for their own meals. Sole greets everyone with a smile and talks to the new settlers, telling them where they can help out and asking what needs being done to make it a better home.

Meanwhile Cready continues to stay where he is, half-listening to the conversation around him. No one says anything to him which he's fine with, glad for it actually. Usually when someone tries talking to him it's either to give out about his line of work or to hire him. Both of which he isn't interested in hearing right now. MacCready never thought he'd see the day where he'd be willingly turning down job offers and yet here he is. When Sole had hired him he was desperate, willing to work for whoever came in even if the pay was low and for a while he resented the fact that he let his price down, hoping that someone else might come up to him and ask for his services. But... after a month or so someone finally did. He never told Sole about it, figured there was no need to. It happened back when they had first broke into that vault to save Nick, after bringing him back Cready waited outside while Sole went in for their statement. He still get's curious sometimes over what that was about, since Sole hadn't told him and he didn't ask. It was a part of his policy that the less he knew about his clients the better. Figured that uneless the information was important it was unnecessary. Still while they were talking to Nick about... whatever it was, a local citizen had come over to him. They were to the point and even had a bag of caps made out ready to pay up front. It was only a chance that Cready would have dreamed about, a simple job, a good days pay enough to live on for a while until he found more contract, even the implication of there being more jobs in the future if he did his part. He couldn't have asked for anything better and yet as he smirked at the local who had a devilish glimmer in their eye he found himself seeing Sole in the back of their mind.

Needless to say he turned them down in his mercenary way of asking for too much until they got fed up and left and not a minute later Sole had retuned. MacCready has tried to put a label on Sole ever since, trying to find out what's so different about them compared to other clients of his, but he never comes up with anything solid. It's infuriating really, the fact that he knows now that he's almost dependant on Sole company and would probably be entirely lost if they decided to pick up someone else.

He looks over to Sole, they're having a very serious with one of the settles about the defences, "The turrets are doing their job at intimidating raiders and the like but when ghouls come along they run in!" -"uh huh?"- "And when they get in we have very few inside defences and those with the guns run away!"-"Really? I'll fix that up for you as soon as possible.", however when they see MacCready looking their way their eyes soften and they smile at him apologetically. Afraid that he's getting bored waiting around for them. He shrugs his shoulders at them and zones back out.  
Honestly, everything would be easier if he could have kept to his policy and not gotten in any way to attached.

Someone coughing draws him out of his thoughts and he looks up with a start to see Sole standing next to him, their head cocked to one side.

"You ready to head out then?" they say.

"You lead and I'll follow, boss."

 

~~~~~~

 

The walk over was mostly uneventful, no life-threatening moments at least, and soon enough the duo found themselves standing at the gates of Diamond city. They both had stopped walking and were standing awkwardly in the entrance, the guards didn't seem to care though. Probably barely awake considering it was still only the early hours of the morning.

"Soooo," MacCready began, "What's the plans? Any specific orders or is it do whatever for the whole day?"

Sole's eyes wandered towards the stairs for a second before they answered, "Don't drink too much for now and meet me at the noodle shop say around... Noon."

"Okay?"

Sole winks at him and walks away, Cready doesn't miss a beat and follows as usual until they inevitably split up, him heading straight to the pub and Sole to Publik occurrences. Sole waves as they walk away.  
It takes them only a second before finding Piper, "Let's do this." they call out, already knowing that they're going to dread what's about to happen.

 

The interview goes smoothly and thankfully Piper didn't ask too many... overly prying questions, which is surprising considering she's a reporter. Sole's glad that she's actually a decent person unlike those back in their day. They leave Piper, promising to come back at some point soon to see how the paper sold and maybe help with a follow up article. It was a lot easier to talk about the happenings this time than before, after having to explain to everyone that you're child is missing it eventually starts to be said as though talking about the weather. Piper was kind and gentle with her words and how she said them, so the time they spent talking was relaxed. There aren't many situations where Sole feels that comfortable with a stranger.   
Once back outside they check the time noticing they still have bit of a while before they have to meet MacCready, deciding to restock on ammo and see if there's any new guns worth buying they walk over to the shops along the walls. 

They're in the middle of a negotiation when out of the corner of Sole's eye they see a familiar figure making their way over to the noodle shop.

"300 caps. Take it leave it." They bite out, teeth gritted. This was only supposed to take a _minute_.

"No deal. 400 caps, no less." the shop owner replies. Sole groans, not liking to be late but also not liking to walk away from a gun like that.

"....Fine!" they relent, "better be fucking worth it."

The grin the owner has on their face only adds insult to injury and Sole snatches the magnum out of their hands with more force than necessary, a death stare added for extra effect. At least it was still cheaper than it's original price. Sole grumbles out curses as they walk towards an empty stool earning them a confused glance form Cready.

"Bad time shopping?" he asks with what would be too much sarcasm for the mood Sole's currently in but instead of becoming even angrier they manage to let out a breathy laugh.

"Oh no, it was peachy. Can't you tell?"

"Guess not." He smirks at them and gesture to robot what's his name.

"Nan-ni shimasho-ka?" the robot asks.

"Get me two servings." MacCready says excitedly. _Too_ excitedly.

"I can't tell if one of those is for me or not." Sole laughs.

"I guess I can spare one just this once."

The robot comes back over with the noodles and he passes one of the bowls over to Sole almost reluctantly. Sole scoffs and digs in.

"So what was it you wanted to meet me here for?" MacCready questions after swallowing, he's already eaten almost half of the bowl.

"Ahh yeah, that.." Sole wipes their mouth before continuing. " What else were you planning on doing today?"

"Pretty much the same as what I was doing before. Why?"

"Just thinking. If, you know, you're not too busy getting pissed out of your mind then if you wanted to we could possibly get started on making our way over to that location you gave me." His eye's widen and he turns to face Sole properly, the morsels of noodles left in his bowl forgotten. " We wouldn't take them out straight away but leaving sometime soon means we could make it there and at least scope the place out. See what we'll be up against. It's only an idea, if you'd rather wait until tomorrow or some other time then that's perfectly fine too."

"Yeah now, now sounds good. Might have to get a few stimpaks first before heading out if that's alright with you, boss." He smile's hugely at Sole, disbelief obvious in his expression along with gratitude and another look in his eye that Sole can't quite place. An intense look, full of determination? They've never seen him look so overjoyed before and it makes their heart swell. If Sole was to tell the truth though, they weren't planning on going so soon. Waiting maybe another day or two, using the time to relax and catch up on sleep. However that plan all changed when Piper had said to them that the paper was practically already written and could be expected to be in print by this evening. After that Sole had wanted to get out as soon as possibly, not for any reason other than they didn't want MacCready to read it. They weren't sure why it was such a big deal to them, but the thought of him knowing all about their past and more about their present was distressing. The two of them work well as a team because they don't know eachother and have no opinions of the other except for what they've former over the past months. The lack of knowledge was a comfort for Sole.

"'Course."

The duo spent the next hour collecting everything that might be needed for journey which included buying out every piece of ammunition they could get their hands on. Sole didn't want to think about how much money they must've spent on that shopping trip alone, but it was about time they got some new armour and stocked up on ammo. Recently they were running out of the stuff faster than they could find it, having to resort to their swords whenever possible. Picking up any ammunition that was lying around or on a dead body was a lot cheaper than buying it but a lot less practical. Cready had bought himself some new clothing too but didn't wear the scarf or t-shirt since the weather was nice enough. Special offer, he'd explained when Sole questioned him about it.   
It was obvious to Sole that Cready was itching to leave as soon as possible and didn't want to waste anytime themselves. The longer they wait before leaving, the less time they'll have under the semi safety of light on their journey. They tapped McCready's shoulder and with a warm smile they gestured it was time to get heading. 

 

~~~

 

The fight was.... brutal. 

The survivor and their merc had arrived at the area as the sun was setting after having jogged the entire way. They both hid under the looming shadows that were being cast by the ruins of the highway and set up their rifles as they'd done a thousand times. They both counted six gunners.

There was more than six gunners.

Sole had never gotten the opportunity until now to take out a gang of runners at one their bases and the one Cready stationed at back in the day was barely even a small community. There was barely any need for snipers in these areas, maybe a few but mostly they only had those with more close range arsenals. Cready told all of this information to Sole on their way there, hoping to make this battle go a little bit smoother with the information on their enemy. However, in the time he was gone for they had improved themselves and their defences. 

They were outnumbered.

That morning they hadn't wasted any time before moving straight away into position and taking out four of the gunners they had marked yesterday, all without a hitch. The rest were out of sight and they were forced to switch to close range  in order to finish them off. Sole wasn't worried about this, two more gunners? No problem, especially with the element of surprise on their side. They had rode the elevator up to the highway and prepared themselves for the showdown with Winlock and Barnes. 

They weren't prepared enough.

The fight was brutal. Neither of them were expecting the gunners to own a set of power armour. They also hadn't expected them to own an assaultron. It was the first time Sole had to fight one, their only other run in with an assaultron was with KLEO who, while intimidating, wasn't a threat as long as they didn't piss her off. Sole didn't know exactly what it was she could do. Not until now. What was supposed to be an easy clear out turned into a game of cat and mouse, trying to find a chance to shoot while staying out of the way of their.. laser? Overall they were unprepared and their weapons weaker than they desperately needed to be.  
After they eventually shut the metallic fucker down all there was left was to finish off the two they had came there for. Beaten and bloody they stood straight and were relentless with their attacks, both falling into harmonies with each bullet they shot. Working together wordlessly, anticipating the others next moves, all until it came down to Barnes and with a quick pull of the trigger by MacCready a bullet soared through the air and planted itself firmly in his forehead. The body falling ungracefully to the floor, Sole watching with laboured breaths. They turned to Cready, the simple movement more painful than it should be. He looked at Sole and tried to move as well but as the adrenaline wore off and the pain shot through him he stumbled almost falling before Sole caught him. 

They didn't say a word to eachother as they left the bodies without looting them and limped back to the camp. On their way over it started to rain, washing away most of the blood that was beginning to crust alone their bodies. Luckily the rain kept away the bloatflies and soon enough they were slowly sitting down against the wall of the tent they had put up the day before.   
They didn't do anything or even say anything for a very long time, the pain throbbing all over a constant reminder that Sole needed to tend to the wounds but they hadn't the energy. The rain had stopped and the sun's low glow came back out from hiding when Sole finally reached into their backback  and pulled out some bandages, an old rag and some purified water. They had stimpaks left, but there was still a distance to travel to the next town where they could replenish their stocks and so if Sole could do without using them they would try to. 

Sole shifted into a better position and wet the cloth, dabbing it as gently as they could to MacCready's forehead where there was an open wound, wiping away the blood that persisted to spill out of it. There was nothing more to be done to it other than cleaning and it didn't look deep enough to need to be stitched. Sole wanted to smile at him, reassure him, but their face was numb and their cheek felt too swollen to be able to move easily anyway. It made Sole's heart ache to see MacCready in such a poor condition. As well as the cut here and there, he had a badly sprained ankle and probably a broken finger or two from when he was knocked down and had the assaultron step on his hand. He came out of this a lot worse for wear than Sole did, mostly because he was the one who found the killer robot in the first place.   
Sole wet the cloth some more and moved towards another spot however Cready weakly held up his left hand, his fingers bent in directions they were not supposed to go, and took the rag out of their hand. He pressed it against Sole's Cheek, careful not to apply too much pressure. They could't help but flinch at the feeling.

"This looks bad." he says quietly, more to himself than to anyone else. " Probably gonna need to stitch this one up and then use a few stimpaks to reduce the swelling." 

With a gentle precision that Sole didn't know MacCready was able to do, he closed the skin around the wound and stimpaked them, much to Sole's displeasure. He had only shoved their hands away and frustratedly told them that they needed it or else they wouldn't even be able to eat properly for a while. 

"There... better?" he asks.

"Yeah, a lot better. Thanks." It's still a little difficult to speak but much less so than earlier.  
Sole looks him in the eyes and smiles since they're able to again. He smiles back and they both remain like that for a few seconds . Their eyes locked and relief blatant on their faces. 

"You look like shit." Sole tells him honestly. He chuckles a little.

" You don't look much better yourself, boss." 

It wasn't in anyway funny, but for some reason the duo broke out into laughter.  
How crazy they both must look to others. Two battered and bloody people sitting down and laughing so hard they have tears in their eyes. And maybe they are. They did just run practically blind into what could be counted as an ambush and never retreated. They could very easily be labelled as crazy and Sole doesn't care one bit. They would do it all again if MacCready ever asked them to.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter, yay!  
> Okay so I'll admit when I first did MacCready's mission well... I was not prepared for assaultrons or anything. Needless to say I died a good few times since my level was kinda low but at least my horrible experience could then be used as inspiration!  
> Hope you enjoy this chapter and thanks again for reading.

A few days pass. Neither had the energy to get back to travelling yet and so they stayed in their tent, living off of the food they had brought with them which mostly consisted of blambo mac and cheese's. Not the most nutritious of meals but Sole wasn't complaining to have food in their stomach. They spent the days relaxing for the first time in over a month. The swelling was gradually going down on Sole's cheek and by the sencond day they began refusing to let MacCready use stimpaks on it, he was stubborn at first but he agreed to leave their small supply alone as long as he didn't see any infection and was still allowed to use up their purified water to clean it regularly.  
Sole asked him where he learnt how to sew and handle wounds like these one day when he was checking on how the stitching was looking. He stopped for a moment, a painful expression flashing over his face before he shook his head and went back to work, obviously brushing them off by saying, "An old friend of mine taught me."  
Sole knew he wasn't going to say anymore on the topic so they left it.  
  
Other than the occasional check-up they spent the next few of the days keeping a watchful eye on their surroundings. Or at least they were both supposed to be but most of their attention was spent reading the comics that Sole picked up on their adventures. Sole wasn't even surprised by the excitement MacCready had shown when Sole pulled them out of their backpack, eagerly grabbing one. If it was anyone else Sole would've grabbed it off of them but they trusted him not to ruin them. "Nerd." they had laughed under their breath. He either didn't hear them, was too engrossed in grognak, or didn't care about the comment because he didn't come back with his usual remarks.  
  
Around the third day Sole was feeling well enough to walk around a little and decided to head back to the area of the battle. Cready had tried to tell them that it wasn't a good idea to go alone, especially considering they weren't in a good enough condition to get into any fights, but Sole went anyway waving goodbye and jokingly blew him a farewell kiss. It seemed much more ominous now than it had when they first went to the intersection. Maybe it was all the dead bodies left untouched, thankfully, or maybe it was the memories of what had happened. Either way Sole was very quick in their looting and returned to Cready with everything they could carry after just over an hour. They were very quiet once they returned and MacCready didn't force them into conversation about it.   
  
On the fourth day, Cready was feeling better and was now able to walk easily again. However Sole knew he wasn't up for making any long journeys since every time he put some pressure onto his ankle he winced ever so slightly. He was itching leave, Sole knew that, but they didn't want to risk worsening his injury by pushing him too hard.  
"We're not leaving yet." Sole said, their voice thick with authority. "Not until you're able to walk properly again." They shot him a look that said, 'Don't even think about arguing', but he only met their gaze.  
  
"We've been sitting here for four days. This is not safe, Sole. We're like sitting ducks out here and sooner or later someone or something will come along to finish our asse-ugh, finish us off." His voice is even but determined.  
  
"No." Sole replied simply. "Look Maccy, we have enough food here to last a few more days and we have cover to protect ourselves with in the case that some scavenger or whatever decides to pay us a little visit. Our asses will be fine. But if we leave now, you and that leg of yours? You're not going to be making it very far and the nearest settlement is still about an hour walking distance."  
  
"You paid me to be your bodyguard-"  
  
"Exactly. So you take your orders from me and I say we stay for another day or two."  
MacCready's quiet for a second. The two stand and stare at each other. He know's they're right, if he walks for too long any bit of healing he did over these past few days would be reversed, but they can't stay here, especially so close to an old base for the gunners. Someone is bound to come looking for them and MacCready is not looking forward to round two which could be easily avoided if they left today. Not to mention Sole is in desperate need of more stimpaks for their cheek. He's doing everything he can to keep away infection but he's not sure it's working.  He lets out a deep sigh and looks away.  
  
"We need to leave."  
  
"Not while you're still badly injured."  
  
"I can easily buy some stimpaks and speed up the recovery once we find a trader.But I can make it there just fine."  
  
"What if we run into anything out there, you can't very well shoot them with your fingers like that." They gestures to his still terribly bent fingers, the index is now back in place after cracking it into position but the others were too painful to touch. He'd need to find a doctor who can fix them properly.  
  
"If we're attacked here I'm no help either." Now it's Sole's turn to let out a deep sigh. He's right of course, no matter what they do there's going to be risks.  
"You're a lot healthier than I am. There's no need to wait around for me, I'm ready to go. In fact I think we should get the heck out of here." MacCready says, shrugging his shoulders.   
  
Sole checked their pipboy to see what time it was. The green screen displaying the map of the area and in the corner reading 12:47. Sole looked into the distance and furrowed their brow in thought. MacCready waited patiently for their orders, having said everything he could.   
A minute went by before Sole finally made a frustrated noise in the back of their throat. " _Fine._ "   
They pushed past him and began packing their bag, carefully piling all of the comics they'd left strewn over the floor together so they wouldn't be damaged. "But if we're leaving now, then we're going to have to move quickly. Can't waste anytime out in the open with you in the state you are."   
Cready followed Sole and began to pack his bag too, he went to grab his rifle but Sole shoved a pistol in his face. He looks at them questioningly but takes it.   
  
"It'll be a hell of a lot easier to use." They explain and he nods in agreement even though the pistol means having to get a little bit too close for comfort with his targets. Sole instead takes his rifle and slings it over there shoulder. 

After a few minutes of gathering all of their belongings together they quickly headed out. Sole was eager to get there as quickly as possible, not liking their odds right now, however they kept their pace a fast walk so that MacCready didn't strain himself too much. He was taking the leading position, his right hand lying readily at his side where the 10mm was resting on his belt. Of course Sole knew that was uncomfortable with the weapon but it was all that they had left having used up a lot of their ammo reserves a back at the interchange . Well there was also a knife they always kept in there shoe but they were kind enough to give him the gun instead.   
  
They occasionally had a sweep around through the scope to scan the area for any hostiles. Usually it was MacCready's job so Sole had to remind themselves every second not to forget to check around them. They were glad to be in this formation though. While usually the two walked side by side, maybe Creads a step or two behind, now with Cready directly in front Sole was able to keep an eye on him, watch how his walking was doing. They hated admitting he was right but... staying there, no matter how relaxing the past few days had been, was too much of a risk. Once they make it to the settlement they can both spend another while relaxing. Besides it's been quite a bit since they checked in with the settlers there, hopefully there weren't too desperate on any resources. Why they couldn't get new crops themselves Sole would never understand. 

"Nice weather we're getting." Sole says, breaking the silence surrounding them. They looked through the scope at the surrounding and then at the sky. Not a single cloud. The tall building Sole had created to keep as a house for the settlers at Oberland was now visible in the distance however it was still another twenty minutes or so away. 

"Yeah." 

"Hopefully this keeps up, as much as I love the rain it can get boring when all you can do is stay inside with some farmers." 

"Hmm."

Sole would be slightly put off by how one sided the conversation feels but they know he's still listening to what they're saying, he just rarely responds when they try talking to him on the road. Sometimes it does annoy them however it can also be nice in order to talk about nothing at someone. 

"The destination doesn't look too far away, should be there soon enough." Sole can see him nodding. The duo's pace had slowed down a little bit from what it was at the start. Sole never said anything about it though, figuring his ankle was beginning to hurt. "How you holding up, Mac?" 

"I'm fine. How's that rip doing?"

Sole's fingers brush against the large wound on their cheek. "Hasn't hurt a bit thanks to the work you've done on it. Gonna have to teach me that by the way."

"You teach me your trick to those difficult locks, I'll teach you how to stitch."

"Deal."  Sole smiles.

  
Finally they reach their destination and Sole places a hand on Cready's arm before walking over to one of the settlers to explain that they'll be staying for a while. Meanwhile MacCready makes his way straight to a seat in the building. The sooner he stops putting pressure on his ankle the better. Just as expected his recovery was starting to disappear and it had begun throbbing again. He reached inside his bag and asked himself how much Sole would mind if he used a stimpak. Surely a trader would come along at some point in time and they could restock.  
"Go for it."   
Cready turned his way to where Sole was leaning against the wall watching him, amused. They had their 'Told you so' face on. MacCready cleared his throat and held out the stimpak to them instead of applying it to himself. 

"Are you finally going to do as I suggest and fix that rip in your face?" He replied, a smirk tugging at his lips. The two were entirely alone, everyone else out farming or patrolling the settlement. Sole didn't move, their eyes flickering between his and the medicine in his hand. Light poured in through a crack between the planks of wood from the walls and a single ray of sunshine spread itself along their face, catching their eye in such a way that it glimmered. MacCready couldn't stop himself from staring at how beautiful it made their eye look. 

Sole let out a breathy laugh and stood up straight, altering the location of the light much to Cready's disappointment. "You wanna do it for me doc?" they stalk towards his sitting form, a mischievous grin spreading across their face. "You're just... so good with your hands. So gentile with me." They bend down real close and Cready has a glazed expression on his face, his head tilting to the side slightly. "Please.." They breath out, batting their eyelashes. From this position MacCready can see the faint freckles dusting along Sole's cheeks and nose.  
If anyone walked in now they would look extremely intimate with eachother.

"You know for someone who literally refuses usually to stop moving you're extremely lazy." He says simply, turning Sole's face and looking at the stitching which luckily are still holding up. Looks like another while before they can come out but there will be a nasty scar left after that. He carefully injects them with the stimpak. "There you go."

Sole straightens up and beams down at him, "Thanks doc. Knew I could count on you." They say gratefully, winking at him.  
MacCready shakes his head at them, used to their constant teasing. Still though, he thinks to himself, it's not that hard to have just asked. "You want me to make you dinner too, boss?" He asks jokingly. Sole smirks at him, "That sounds pretty nice actually, dinner in bed. You could feed it to me as well, while you're at it. Maybe throw in some fanning. Is it just me or is it hot in here?" 

Cready scoffs and grab another dose of medicine for himself. God, there's only two left. He quickly injects himself and it's instant relief. He let's his head fall back and sighs. Gotta love modern medicine.   
"Wow. You only ever get _tha_ t look on your face when you have a bowl of those noodles from Diamond city." Sole sniggers. He lifts his head and is sees Sole bending down undoing their boots. 

he ignores their remark. "You planning on sleeping? It's only, what? Half one or something." 

"Nah, just slipping into something a little bit more comfortable." They take out a pair of old slippers from a nearby wardrobe. "Might have a nap though while I wait  for you to make dinner. What's on the menu? Something medium burnt or pure ashes?"

"Haha.. very funny." They're never going to let him live down that day.

"I am nothing if not a comedian. Anyway we've been invited to eat with the settlers here as thanks for all the work I did for them. Perks of being the general." They smile blissfully at the thought of a free, cooked meal. "Also there should be a trader passing by in a day or two. How's the stocks looking?"

"I've got two stimpaks left and only a single bottle of purified water." 

"Shit. I've got another three stimpaks but that's it." 

MacCready scratches the back of his neck and stands up. " Hey Sole?"

"Sup?"

"I never got a chance to properly thank you for helping me take out Winlock and Barnes." He had thanked them already, the day after all the shit went down. He appreciated the fact that Sole had gone with him to the interchange to take the gunners out and paid them back the money they had originally spent buying his services. Sole promised to buy him a drink once they made it back to Diamond city.

"So.. you think we're done with the gunners?" They ask. They'd wondered if maybe their move might have put an even bigger mark on MacCready's back, he'd said that there was no way for them to even know he was involved but they were still weary.

"Definitely. With those two clowns taking a dirt nap, I'm pretty sure the gunners heard my message loud and clear." The corners of his mouth tug into a small sincere smile, "Couldn't have done it without your help. You stuck your neck our for me and I don't forget shit..err I mean stuff like that." 

It's the second time today Cready had stopped himself from cursing and Sole cocked their head at him. "You know, seriously what's up with the whole thing you've got with swearing? You can curse all you want, I'm not your parents."

He glares friendlily at them, "Very funny. It's not about you, it's about that promise I told you I made." Sole nods to show that they remember. He takes a deep breath and looks somewhat conflicted before continuing. "When I left the Capital Wasteland I didn't just leave Little Lamplight behind.. I left my family behind." Sole's a little confused at hearing the word family, he had told them before that he never knew his parents. They listen to him intently. "Had a beautiful wife named Lucy... and a son we named Duncan." He looks away, "He's the one I made my promise to.. a promise to clean my act up and to be a better person. I guess that sounds pretty stupid coming from a guy who shoots people for a living."   
Sole mostly speechless at hearing this new information. After all of their time they spent together, Sole never suspected him as being a father or having a wife. Suddenly they feel guilty at all of the flirtatious things they'd said and done. But... he left them behind and that's the detail that really sticks with them.

"How could you leave them behind like that" They ask, however it comes out more accusing then it was supposed to. Sole hadn't left their family behind, they'd had it ripped away from them while they were helpless to stop it. Hearing that he left made them question type of person Cready was.

His eyes snap back up to meet theirs, "I didn't have much of a choice." Sole wants to scoff at that but he continues," My son.. he's sick. I don't know what's wrong with him. One day, he's playing out in the field behind our farm... the next he's took a fever and these blue boils popped up all over his body." Sole shuts their eyes and let's out a deep breath. The poor kid.   
"Last I saw he was almost too weak to walk. I didn't dare ask him to come with me." His voice quietens, "Honestly, I don't know how much longer he's going to last." 

Sole's incredibly guilty for doubting him but they're still unsure why he's out here. However they also don't know what to say, opting for trying to lighten the mood, "Maybe you should find a doctor." They say hesitantly, hoping that joking will get ride of the intense look of pain in his eyes.

He shakes his head, "Every doctor I've talked to was worthless. The never even heard of the disease. I don't need them.." He stares into Sole's eyes," I need someone like you."   
Sole feels their heart skip a beat at the intensity in his gaze, but quickly reminds themselves that he's actually married. "You've already done so much for me, I feel horrible asking for more help. But if you're willing to risk it, I might have a way we could save him."  
  
Sole blinks trying to process everything. Of course they'd help him, especially if it's to save his son's life. They try not to sound too eager though, they ran in practically blind to help him last time and they both paid for that fact, their cheek and Cready's fingers as obvious evidence to that and so they ask, "How risky are we talking?" 

"I'm not going to lie to you... it's no walk in the park. If it was easy I would have already done it myself." Sole bites their lip in thought. They're not going to be able to run off and do it straight away, neither of them are in a good enough condition for that but Sole understands the urgency of the situation. They wish he'd told them sooner, they're glad he's surviving this long though but despite this being something that can't be delayed they're not able to do this yet. Another week at least before they can even begin thinking about it.  
MacCready must take their prolonged silence as uncertainty about helping him out. "Look. I really need your help on this one... Duncan needs you too."

Sole instantly shakes their head, "Of course I'll help, Maccy. Count me in." The words couldn't come out fast enough.

"I was hoping you'd say that." He smiles at Sole like they're some miracle in his life. Sole refuses to let themselves blush. Why are all the cute ones in need of saving married, they think absent-mindedly. "A few months before we met, I bumped into a guy named Sinclair who claimed his buddy caught some kind of disease. I thought he was wasting my time until he said his partner broke out in blue boils. They dug up information about a cure at a place called Med-Tek research. They even managed to grab the building's lockdown security codes. Unfortunately, Sinclairs buddy died before they were able to break into the facility. I mean there's no way that's a coincidence right?" His words slowly quickening in the speed they were coming out of his mouth. "Med-Tek has to be the place."

Sole clicks their tongue and places a reassuring hand on his shoulder, "Can you trust this guy? I don't want this to all be for nothing."

"To be honest, I don't know him from Adam. But he brought up the blue boils and the sickness his partner suffered from. There's no way  that's a coincidence .. or a trap. Wouldn't make any sense." Sole nods in agreement. No one would know him that well to be able to trap him using the cure as bait and no one would know him so far back in order to have knowledge about it and then make an elaborate plan just to trick him like this. "If Sinclair says Med-Tek Research is the place, that's where we need to go... otherwise I got nothing else." His voice quietens a little with the last remark and Sole squeezed his shoulder, smiling at him. 

"Hey. Don't lose hope on me now, if there's a cure we'll find it."

"Thanks, partner." Sole's smile widens at the word partner. Since he did pay them back, technically they aren't his boss anymore. They're now just partners. Surviving in this world together. 

"Partner, does that mean I can't boss you around anymore? God.. there goes my plans for the fanning thing later. Sure I can find another burly farmer who would be happy to do the job anyway."

He laughs a little. "I know we can't go there right this second but-"

"We'll go there as soon as we can. You have my word on that Maccy." The smell of food cooking catches Sole's attention and then look towards the door excitedly, "Think dinner might be ready soon. C'mon, I'm starving and in desperate need of something other than Mac and Cheese. " They face him and speak coyly, winking, "The meal would be much improved if it was a different Mac covered in cheese." 

"That's probably the worst line you've used so far." 

"...Yeah." The suck in air through their teeth and move towards the door gesturing for him to follow with their chin. 

They both move to leave but when Sole places their hand on the doorhandle, Cready stops them. "Sole... What you're doing.. no one's ever cared that much about me before. Even if it takes me the rest of my life, I'll repay this debt to you. I swear it." Sole's chest tightens again and they swallow thickly.

"Don't mention it Creads. Anything you need... I'm here for you." 

The duo make an unspoken agreement that no matter what the other will be there for them.   
Sole had thought that they'd grown closer over the past four days but it was nothing compared to the connection they made in those last couple of minutes. 

MacCready was incredibly glad to finally have someone like Sole in his life. It had been so long since he last had someone to watch his back who he trusted completely and while he may not know who they really are personality wise, he has no doubt in his mind that they're someone he never wants to lose. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter~  
> Thank you to everyone reading this fanfic, I really appreciate it as well as the kudos! Sorry for taking so long to get this chapter out, I've had exams these past few weeks so I had no time or motivation to write... But hey, happy valentines day!  
> I know there are a lot of typos made throughout these chapters but I have no one to proofread for me and when I finish a chapter I tend to only quickly glance through it to fix the most obvious of mistakes. Soon enough, however, I'll go through everything properly and fix it.  
> Any reviews are also much appreciated so feel free to tell me your opinions and how I can improve. <3

The days in the settlement passed easily. Neither did anything straining other than helping out with the farming, to which the settlers had insisted that Sole instead rest inside but they refused to sit idly while everyone else did all the work. Sole couldn't help but snigger however at the offended look on MacCready's face at having not had the same offer.  
Both couldn't wait to head out onto the road and on the second day of their stay the trader had finally come along. Sole didn't hesitate as they handed over a fair amount of the caps they kept on-hand in order to buy out all of the medical supplies available. MacCready had offered to split the cost but Sole only blocked their ears and walked away. Although they wouldn't have let him paid anyway they felt guilty considering most of their supply had been used on them.  
"So.. when are we planning on heading back out?" Cready had asked that evening, his hand rubbing at the crooked fingers on the other. Sole gave him a reassuring smile, knowing that the fact they wouldn't allow him to use his rifle was slowly eating away at MacCready. Not that there had been any use of either of there weapons but that rifle of his was like a third arm.

"Soon enough. You're ankles getting better right?"

"Sure is."

"Great. How does tomorrow morning sound then? Make the trip to Diamond city, get you to a doctor. Shouldn't take too long and we can just... I dunno. Figure out a plan of action from there. I gotta admit, sitting on my ass these past few days is driving me just the littlest bit insane." Sole laughed lightly.  
In all honesty they missed fighting. No matter how many bad experiences they had Sole still missed the rush from charging in, guns blazing. Missed the feeling that what they were doing was for some bit of good. It kept them busy and too preoccupied to be able to think about the future... what was going to happen about Shaun. After hearing Mac talk about Duncan it only caused Sole to spend that nigth tossing and turning thinking about how little progress they had made on that case. Sole wanted to find Shaun and know if he was alright. God they missed their son but... finding him meant hunting down Kellogg and while Nick had said that he was willing to come along and lend a hand, Sole was hesitant to leave and find him.  
The fights and good Samaritan deeds was easier to focus on than the guilt of how afraid they were of what they would find once they got the chance to speak to Kellogg. The terror of whether or not Shaun was even still alive. Where's Preston and his settlements in trouble when you need him, huh?

"-Sun isn't really the gentlest of doctors but... I guess it's better than the alternative." MacCready's voice brings Sole back out of their thoughts. He notices the unfocused look on their face however and frowns. "Even when I'm agreeing with you it's boring? Thanks Boss."

"Don't get your panties in a twist, I was listening. Look Dr. Sun isn't that bad and he's a lot better qualified than I am to fix you up and you need to get back to covering me." MacCready's eyes scrutinized them, unsatisfied that they were actually listening. They rolled their eyes at him. "The suns setting anyway now so how about an early night and off at dawn?"

"Uh-huh. Whatever you say." Cready snorts and tugs his hat down as a chilly wind blows by. The first wind of Autumn, Sole thinks to themself. They quirk their lips at him and places a hand on his shoulder, walking towards the sleeping area. It was nice to have a bed to sleep on instead of a sleeping bag but.. it could never be as comfortable as the bed back home. Back in Sanctuary 210 years ago.   
Sole couldn't help the sigh that escaped their lips. The sooner they were on the road the better. 

 

~~~~~

 

MacCready was disappointed to find out that when Sole said, "off at dawn", they meant off at dawn. He didn't waste any time before complaining but Sole only laughed at him. "Cheer up MacGrumpy", they had said to him which only made the complaining worse.  
The hours were long under the cool air although they eventually reached the outskirts of central Boston. The familiar raider territories that had been cleared out the week earlier was now crawling with more of the scum and Sole couldn't have been happier to finally get the chance to throw themselves into a fight again. Letting their mind run blank of nothing other than what their next move would be. How easy this was compared to the gunners, it almost made Sole laugh at the fact that when they first came out of that vault raiders were some of the worst threats in their life, at least until they discovered Super mutants.  
That was a fun day... It was about two days later when Sole found MacCready. Now, _that_ was a fun day.

Sole of course noticed the slight worried glances Cready continued to send their way every time they made a detour through another raider infested area. He didn't say a word but Sole knew he was feeling extremely uncomfortable with the small pistol they had given him. They had to give him credit though, he was still a damn good shot without the scope although a bit slower, possibly hesitant, to shoot. His usual quick reflexes weren't working up to speed with the downgrade however that didn't matter for what they were doing. After the trader came along they not only sold out on medical supplies but also most of their ammunition. It was comforting knowing there was no worries of ammos on the trip into Diamond city but it was still not the smartest of ideas to waste it clearing out areas for no reason, especially since Sole for definite that more will only come back.   
The duo continue on their way and soon spot the guards outside of Diamond city telling them they had pretty much arrived. As they passed some of the guards nodded their head in greeting but most ignored them. Sole had begun befriending the citizens of the city ever since they brought Nick back, he did good work helping everyone solve their own mysteries and despite how busy he must be he's still willing to help track down Kellogg. Maybe they should take him up on his offer. The only problem is having more than one companion can become too risky and they definitely don't want to leave MacCready alone, especially after everything they've been through.

"You doing okay there, boss?" Cready asks, his face entirely neutral but the slight increase of pitch gives away his concern. "Kinda looking a little... broody."

"What makes you say that?" Sole replies throwing a smirk his way to try and ease him but they don't get to wait for an answer as they trip over a hole in the road, losing their footing momentarily. Cready effortlessly catches them, anticipating the stumble. The wry expression on his face says enough.   
"It doesn't matter." They say quickly, moving towards the entrance of the city again this time a lot more cautious of the rocky floor. 

Before they can even think of doing anything about Shaun they need to get that medicine for Duncan. Surely Shaun isn't in too much harm, the institute wouldn't..  _kill_ him would they? Sole sighs again.   
They walk inside in unison. Sole takes the pouch they use for storing their caps and throw it at MacCready, he fumbles slightly having been caught off guard but doesn't let it drop.

"Go get that hand fixed up, I'll be right there." They say walking away from the market.

"Sure thing, boss." 

MacCready stands in place for a second, watching Sole walk away. He knows something's bothering them but he doesn't know how to ask or even how to help them. They walk down the alleyway that leads to the guard station but then takes a right. Valentine's office perhaps? He shrugs off the worry and walk towards Dr.Sun. There was a matter Sole wanted to discuss with Nick before so they could be following up on that, or maybe they're not even going there. Either way it's none of his business, Cready reminds himself strongly. Although he can't say he feels any more comforted by the thought. 

"Hey, Doc. I need some treatment." He calls out to the doctor who's messing with around at the chemistry station. 

"Very well," Sun sighs, turning to face Cready. "What needs fixing? Radiation? Addiction?" MacCready holds up his hand, showing off the swollen fingers, and Sun nods. "This will only take a minute. Doesn't look in need of surgery but only time will tell once these are re-aligned." Cready nods this time to give the impression that he's listening when really his mind can't help but wander. For the past few days it's all he's been doing, thinking. Specifically thinking back the conversation he had with the Boss about Duncan. He can't understand why they're doing so much for him, surely they have their own problems to deal with. And yet... after already having done so much for him with Winlock and Barnes, they continue to help. It's doesn't make sense. 

"Have a read of the newspaper on the station if you want, this is going to hurt." Sun points to the paper and begins cracking the bone fragments back into place. 

"Ffu-umph, couldn't spare any med-x?" Cready asks jeeringly. The doctor doesn't reply and Cready takes him up on his offer about the paper deciding a distraction would be brilliant right about now. 

Oh no,  _this_ doesn't make sense. 'View from the Vault' the title read. MacCready's eyes read down the front page, questioning how Piper managed to get an interview with a vault dweller. He didn't even know there were any vaults around here other than vault 81 which he knows for a fact doesn't hoard any carnivorous guinea pigs. Besides them every other vault was pretty much destroyed and now raider or gunner territory. Whoever the interviewee is, Cready can tell already he'd get along with them and their sense of humour. He continues reading but freezes when his eyes scan over the vault dwellers name. Sole. It's a pretty uncommon name. A name of which he only knows one person goes by.  
The rest of page leaves him slack-jawed and stunned. The remark of enjoying blowing things up sounds just like the boss, he thinks with disbelief.

Didn't they say they were doing an interview? Never mentioned coming from a vault though... or that they had a son. 

MacCready has to reread that paragraph a couple of times before the words finally sank in. Sole has a son, Shaun. A son who was kidnapped from them. He had no idea. All this time, when they went to talk to Nick, they were hunting down those responsible for taking away their son. Truthfully he'd heard Sole utter the name before sometimes when they were asleep but he thought nothing of it. Nearly everyone has a name they call out. And then there was the day when Sole managed to get a place in the memory den, he'd stayed out of their way and didn't hear the memory Sole had wanted to see but the painful expression they had when they were in the pod, the apologies for 'putting them through that'... god. They were probably reliving that moment weren't they?  
He wants to be more surprised that they'd never told him but their relationship was always business, strictly business, there was no need to tell the hired merc about your missing son. Although after everything MacCready had been open about, his life with Duncan and Lucy, the realisation of how little he actually knows of the Boss's life shocked him. 

"How long ago was this paper printed?" Cready asks, his voice wavers a little and he's not sure if it's from the pain or not. He wants to be sure it really is the Boss. But even if it is, how does he bring something like this up? Should he? It's a tough situation, he can understand why they wouldn't have spoken about it. It took months before he told them about Duncan and he still hasn't told them the full story about that whole situation. 

"Hmm? About a week ago. Don't disturb me or this will only take longer." Sun snaps at him. 

Shit. It has to be them.

Cready's moving onto the third page of the paper when he spots the Boss out of the corner of his eye. Oh no, should he put down the paper and pretend he never read it? No, it's a public paper, nothing to be ashamed of reading. But if it's personal information about Sole then-

"How's it looking Doc?" Sole says with an appealing smile, making a start on getting a discount. "Think he'll ever be able to use those fingers again or is it finally time for amputation?" The doctor scoffs and MacCready can't bring himself to turn his head to look at either of them properly, his right hand still holding onto the paper guiltily. It's a damn piece of paper. 

"He's fine to go now, got the fingers re-aligned and put a splint in between there. He doesn't appear to be paying attention though so I'll let you know to not let him use the hand unless necessary for another two weeks, less with continuous stimpak use if you're able and under no circumstances is he to use that hand for any strenuous exercise if he wants it to heal without surgery."

"You got it." 

MacCready drops the paper now that he has a reasonable excuse not to be holding it anymore and hands the caps to Dr.Sun, not even allowing Sole a chance to finish buttering Sun up. The doctor takes it and gestures for them to leave, taking up his position at the chemistry station again. "If you ever have any more medical needs you know where to find me."

"That was a lot quicker than I was expecting." Cready says tautly. Sole glances at him and shrugs.

"It's only a few broken bones, Maccy. You did hear what he said though right? No using it for a week or two."

"Yeah, yeah. I heard." he waves his hand dismissively. 

"That means you can't do anything for the next while, nothing like getting that cure." Their voice tightens and they stare into Cready's eyes. He feels uncomfortable under their gaze for some reason but returns it, unsure of where they're going with the conversation. "Mac... " they begin softly but stops, inhaling deeply. Cready knows that's never a good sign. They break the eye contact much to his relief and exhales. "Maybe you should..." they pause again, conflicted, ".. go save some seats for you and I at Vadim's. You guys know eachother right? I said I'd get you a drink once we reached the 'great green jewel'." It's obviously not what they were going to say but they seem satisfied enough.

"Didn't you give out to me before for drinking too early in the day?" 

"It's been a long week, we both deserve to sit down and drink even if it's only one pm." They smirk at him and he has no complaints. Saying it's been a long week is a complete understatement. 

 

~~~~~

 

The 200 caps were spent quickly. When Sole had first sat down next to MacCready on the couch they had jokingly challenged him to a drinking game, the type were whoever finishes their bottle first wins. Turns out when there's two stubborn and sore losing competitors they tend to have many rematches and so there caps was dwindling steadily. Vadim was pleased of the busy at first but as the afternoon went on he tried to warn them not to drink much more, cutting them both off the stronger drinks he served.

"Three...two..." Sole counted down, both had their bottles placed at their lips ready. They kept on eye on eachother so neither could cheat which ended with both sitting sideways on the couch. There was a surprisingly small amount of business during the day and so no one was around to care about their disruptions. "One!" 

Not a second was wasted before they were chugging back the beer, barely tasting it at this point. Which worked excellently in Sole's favour who would other be unable to drink the stuff. 

Sole pulls back the bottle with a huge triumphant grin. Making a show of swallowing they last gulp they placed the bottle with the others and fist-bumped the air.   
"Ohhh yeah, winner over here!" They cheered for themself. 

"Damn it." Cready groaned, pulling his bottle back with only a dribble left. "So close." 

"Suck on that, Maccy. How many wins is that for me overall? Like.. more than you?" Their words were slurring pretty badly at this point. 

"Wow okay... first of all, vodka's difficult to get down." He wasn't much better, worse if anything. 

"Not for me it ain't." Sole's face was flushed and they couldn't stop giggling from the alcohol. With the subtle smile on their lips and the small giggles they let out randomly, MacCready found himself smiling too. Despite the gash along their face adding a rougher edge to their otherwise rounded cheeks, they look beautiful. Still in need of that haircut. But... Sole was certainly easy on the eyes. Cready aks himself how he hadn't noticed before now. Then again he never had the chance to be this close to Sole and study their features. 

"You know, I'mma... I'm calling it here. No more rematches, whatever.. you won, congrats I guess." He smirks at them, throwing his hands up in defeat. 

"Really, you going down that easily? Or have you finally realised there's no defeating," Sole jumps up and flexes, "the Champion?!" MacCready has trouble holding back his laughter at the sheer unexpectedness of it. 

"Alright then, Champion. I think it's time we both let up on the drink. Besides.. you've spent everything. " Cready says, standing up too. He's wobbly on his feet at first but steadies himself. Putting a hand on Sole's shoulder he guided them toward Yafim. 

"Aww but I was just getting started." Sole pouted, although they didn't try to pull away or resist instead slumping their head against Cready's hand. They snake a hand around his waste to further steady themself and he moves his hand so that his arm is around both their shoulders. 

"Gettin' started on that hangover you mean?" They jab a finger into his side. "How much for a room?" 

Before Yafim can answer, Vadim calls out, "For you two, it's free. Just don't make too much of a mess." Cready get's the feeling that statement was a little less than innocent. 

"No promises." Sole calls back, giggling yet again. Cready makes a mental note that the best bit of them when they're drunk is the giggling. How can someone like that even have it in them to make that noise?

Yafim points to the room begrudgingly and they stumble through. It's small but there's a bed in it which is all Cready's really focusing on, standing or even sitting upright was beginning to get too dizzying. However he let's Sole lie down in it instead. He moves to sit in a chair in the room but Sole grabs his sleeve. 

"Nu-uh" Is all they say and slides over to make room for him on the bed. It's a tiny gap and if he was to lie down as well there'd be no room between them. At his hesitation Sole, who's eyes are already closed, pats the bed impatiently and he finally joins them.   
They both lie together in silence, after spending the last hour or two getting stupidly drunk and laughing the entire time they had finally ran out of conversations for the time being. That didn't bother either one of them anyway. The silence was nice, just the both of them lying together on their sides, facing the other. Usually it's rare for there to ever be a time to relax and not have to worry about being ambushed but these past few days had been so blissfully peaceful that it'll probably take a while to get back into the routine of staying alert at 3am. It's still only quite early in the afternoon however and Cready wonders if they're going to sleep for the rest of the day or start planning to head out. He's about to ask but Sole speaks first.

"There's something I need to talk to you about." They say gently, almost as though they're trying to comfort him. They sound much more sober now already which only further worries Cready. "I wanted to say it earlier but... I dunno. You looked a lil' worried about something and so I didn't want to add to it or whatever." Sole still has their eyes shut but MacCready is watching their face for any sign of what they want to say. "MacCready... I think... maybe it might be a good idea, what with your fingers and all, to stay at Sanctuary for a little while or Goodneighbour." 

"What? Where are you going?" He sputters out.

"I'm gonna go get that cure for you, don't worry." Sole opens their eyes are looks at him. "I just think it might be best for you to not come.. with me." 

"So you're going to what? Head in alone? It's not safe, boss." He's frozen still, like hell he's going to wait around while they go in alone. "It's basically suicide. Trust me." 

"..Mac-"

"Don't 'Mac' me. You can't do this without any backup." 

"I won't be." He blinks. " Nick offered to accompany me a while ago.. help me with some... stuff." 

"Stuff like your son?" He spits out. He doesn't know why he said it, why it was in anyway important. And yet he decided now was the time to bring it up. He wants to instantly apologize although Cready can't deny the offence he feels over not being told for some reason he can't place.   
Sole closes their eyes again and let's out a deep sigh. They move so they're lying on their back. 

"Yeah, stuff like that." There's a pause. " I've been putting it off but I know I can't for any longer. That doesn't in anyway mean that I'm going to go back on my promise and leave you waiting for that cure. I told you I'd get it and I will. I swear." Sole turns their head to face MacCready and smiles at him, lifting a hand to smooth out his furrowed brows. "I swear."

"...I can't sit around idly waiting for you to come back. Sure I can't use my sniper rifle easily and constantly, but I can still use it and when I can't there's that pistol you gave me." He begins. "Besides.. you can't get in anyway without the codes." 

Sole smirks at him, "You're not going to try and bribe me are you?" 

"It's not bribery. Just a fact."

Sole rolls their eyes and takes their hand back. "It's too risky bringing you Mac, you could get hurt even worse. Nick is... I trust Nick to have my back in there. If you came along with both of us there would be too many people which can lead to dangers. It's overall better if you stay behind. For you're own good."

"I know what my limit is, boss."

"You said it yourself, this place is bad business. It wouldn't be long I'm sure before you reached your limit."

Despite all of the tension in the room and the serious topic of conversation, MacCready laughed. A short, bitter laugh. But a laugh nonetheless. "You don't give up do you?"

"Neither do you, it seems."

Cready props himself up on one arm, which was much more dizzying than he expected, eyes meeting with Sole's. "Guess that means that.. you'll just have to put up for me with me." 

"...." Sole's gaze flickers between his eyes to his nose to his lips back up to his eyes. "You're the worst." They say finally.

"Yeah well, you're drunk so your sense of judgement isn't really working." MacCready drops back down into his previous lying position.

There's another stretch of silence, back to being peaceful, before Sole speaks up again. "So.. you read the paper, huh?" They're quieter now than before. Still gentle however instead of comforting they sound vulnerable. Cready isn't sure how to respond, guilt forming in his stomach from having brought anything up. 

"Yeah, I did." He admits. 

"You seemed a little bit..off.. after the doctors. I assume you were reading it, you did have a paper in your hands you see." He feels as though they wanted him to make a comment but nothing came to mind and so Sole continues. "I'm sorry, I guess, for not saying anything. I know you've told me so much and I've said nearly nothing about myself or my past, my actual past. You've been so open and I... haven't been. It's difficult to talk about." They're words speed up. "Which doesn't mean it wasn't difficult for  _you_ to talk about. It's only that I.. I-I haven't told anyone about what happened. Except for Nick. But I'm willing to tell you, if you want. It's not fair if I know everything about you." 

"Oh shi- no, no no. It's fine really. I shouldn't have said anything. It was stupid and rude to bring that up like that. You don't have to tell me anything you're not comfortable saying, Sole." 

"Jesse." 

"What?"

Sole smiles faintly at MacCready. "It's my name. Jesse. I get everyone to call me Sole though, easier really to go by something different to match this.. different world. You're the first one to know it so you should feel pretty honoured right now."  

And so that's how the rest of their evening went, Sole telling MacCready everything. That, no, there wasn't carnivorous guinea pigs but actually cryogenic pods in the vault. That they used to be married, lived in that house back in Sanctuary hills. Even had a son, Shaun. Sole told him everything and he wasn't sure why but he believed every unbelievable word they said. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was the way everything fit together. Matching up with his understanding of Sole. No matter what it was, MacCready felt more determined than before to protect them and help them get back their son. Even if it takes him the rest of his life.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, real sorry for this being as late as it is!   
> Sorry if the ending comes across as a little bit rushed, I wanted to finish this and move on quickly to the more storyline stuff. Aaaaanyway, thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter, finally. I honestly didn't mean to leave this for so long wow..This is more of a filler, in between main storyline, type of chapter. The next updates after this will be more ... progressive than this one!  
> Again, spoilers for the main storyline and side quests for companions and such coming up from now on! Also about 3 months have passed since the last chapter by the way. This would've taken way too long if I put in everything without letting some time pass by.  
> Thank you for reading, enjoy!

"Here."

MacCready looks up to see Hancock handing him a beer. He shoots him a curious glance but takes the bottle. "What's the occasion? Aren't I the one who usually gets your drinks,  _mayor._ " 

"You've been sitting in here staring off into that distance for the past few hours. Figured a drink might help take whatever it is off your mind." Hancock replied with an easy shrug. "Which I'm gonna guess is Sole." MacCready scoffs by reflex while Hancock only winks at him with a knowing grin.

"What makes you think I've got anything on my mind? Maybe I'm just enjoying the beautiful scenery."

"Ahh yes, those ruined buildings are truly a masterpiece."

"Glad you agree."

Hancock finishes off his bottle which was already only half full when he came over, and shoves MacCready gently. "Come on, out with it. I wouldn't be your loving Mayor or your friend if I didn't pressure you for answers. Sole finally get fed up lugging around your mopey ass?"

"What even makes you think this has anything to do with Sole? They've been gone for what? Three... four days?" Cready says as nonchalantly as he can manage but in truth... He's getting bored as fuck waiting for them. It's not a cause for concern, Sole can look after themself and he doesn't doubt Danse either. Sadly when you're not looking for mercenary work in the middle of Goodneighbour the place ends up becoming only slightly unbearably boring after the initial first few nights of drinking. After the past months spent entirely with Sole he hasn't had the chance to feel bored. Before they made their way into his life business had been slow. How the hell did he deal with the waiting around back then? ...Sat and drank. Just like what he's doing now. Some things never change.   
"And no, they're not 'Finally fed up with me.'" 

Hancock snorts and mumbles under his breath, "That's what you like to think.", earning him a not so gentle punch to the arm. "Lighten up Cready." 

Some months back the thought of Sole ditching him would have been a huge cause for concern. What would he do for money? He could probably find a new job, sure, but it might take a while and then Winlock and Barnes would still be a problem. If Sole ditched him, quite frankly he'd be screwed. However nowadays, the thought of them going their separate ways is completely absurd.  
After everything they've done together... There's no way they'd split up at this point. It's a strange feeling, for the longest time MacCready had no one but himself to count on but now he has Sole. His partner. They could've left a long time ago. Back when they had killed those two assholes for him and he paid Sole back the caps they spent buying his services, they could've left. Except they didn't. Then they helped him get that cure for Duncan. They had Nick at that point, Piper, Garvey, god they had so many other choices... and yet they always turned up dragging him along to their next mission.  
He had to admit, when they finally got that cure and sent it away to Duncan, the next few weeks he wondered if Sole was going to leave and there was a week where they did, when Danse had to train them up for the Brotherhood. There was no reason to come back for him. No more obligations like his sick son keeping them around. However they came back and brought him along to every assignment the Brotherhood gave them from that point onwards. Every bit of worry disappeared.  
In fact as time passed instead of growing apart they only managed to become even closer. They were practically attached at the hip at this point. There were no secrets between them anymore. Everything they did was for the most part together. It was everything MacCready hadn't realised he'd needed. 

"So if they haven't ran off away from you then what? Feeling jealous over that  _Soldier_?" Hancock spits out the title with disgust. Which Danse deserved, the way he treated ghouls... the way the Brotherhood treated ghouls. Hancock had every right to be disgusted by him. 

"Oh yeah, definitely. I cry every night thinking that he's the one Sole's parading around with. I'm surprised you can't hear the sobs of ' _Why wasn't it me?'"_ He says sarcastically. 

"Whatever you say, lover boy. But I'll be keeping an ear out if those two come waltzing through those doors with joined hands."

Cready want's to deny it but..Okay maybe Hancock's somewhat right about that one. Before he might have denied it but, well, not any more. Of course he's said nothing to Sole but Hanock and him are close friends, what's the point in trying to disagree with him? Maybe these past few days he has been feeling.. a little jealous. Nothing would ever happen between them two, he knows that or at least hopes so, but it's sickeningly obvious how Danse would jump at the chance to become more involved with Sole. The way he looks at them... The glares he throws at MacCready when they cross paths on the Prydwen. He can't help but get a bit riled up sometimes.  
When Sole told him that they were going to head out for a short bit with Danse doing super secret Brotherhood stuff he didn't mind. Sole could do whatever they wanted, that wasn't a problem at all. The problem lay in the way Danse looked absolutely  _giddy_ at the chance to have Sole to himself for that time. If they did come back together as more than when they left MacCready would... well he probably wouldn't be in the best of moods for the next, oh, year maybe?

"If that happens then you're going to have to bring out your emergency jet reserves for the both of us." He tries to sound light-hearted about it but he's being completely honest.

"No, I'll be breaking out the addictol 'cause I won't believe I'm not just having a bad trip. I'd hope Sole would have better tastes than that egotistical asshole." 

"I'll drink to that," MacCready says, finishing off his beer. Hancock gives his shoulder a quick squeeze. 

"Guess it's your lucky day, I don't see any hand holding going on. Or any power armour trudging through." MacCready sits up straight following Hancocks gaze. "Hey Sole! Over here!" Hancock calls out, gesturing for Sole to come and join them.

"Hey boys, miss me?" They ask with a tired smile, sitting down next to Cready leaving barely any space between the two. 

"Barely even noticed you were gone." Cready says, his mood instantly picking up along with his heart rate.

"Haah haah." Sole replies blandly. "How bout you Hancock? Long time no see? I'm hurt at the lack of love here guys." 

"Has it been that long? Feels like only yesterday." He smiles and fist bumps Sole. "You look like you could use this. Helps with the exhaustion." Sole tuts at him but takes the jet nonetheless. 

"Long trip?" Cready asks agreeing with Hancock that they look wrecked.

"Tell me about it." Sole sighs and slumps against him slightly. "Turns out the simple little job turned into something much more complicated that involved a hell of a lot more travelling than I signed up for." They yawn and crack the bones in their back. "While I'd love to hang around for the welcome back party I'm sure you guys definitely planned for me, I'm gonna go crash."

"Fair enough, I've got mayoral duties to attend to anyway. Guess the cake will have to wait." Hancock leaves first waving as he enters back into the hall. Sole waves back and then stands too, dragging MacCready up with them.

"C'mon, now that he's gone I've got some jaw dropping news you need to hear before anyone else." The intense look in Sole's eyes makes Cready curious as to what happened when they were gone. They don't say anymore though and grabs his elbow, steering him along to the hotel. 

They're about to buy a room but MacCready stops them before they reach the front desk, holding up the key to his own room. "No need to waste your money, you can just take mine if you want. I've got Hancocks couch to crash at anyway." 

"Ever the gentleman." They say coyly, taking the keys out of his hand. He rolls his eyes but is powerless to stop the smirk that forms on his lips. They don't release their grip on MacCready's arm until they finally reach the room. Sole barely even waits until they've opened the door before swinging around to face him, walking backwards into the room.   
"So as I was saying, jaw dropping. Mac... my heads still spinning."

"Go on." He says, eagerly awaiting what it is Sole has to tell him. He quietly closes the door behind him and leans against it. 

"So the Brotherhood? Dicks. Every last one of them. I probably shouldn't tell you what the missions was but.."

"When has that ever stopped you?" he laughs.

"Fair point. Danse and I had to go and collect some missiles, worst thing they've put me up to yet. Nothing like fuelling another army with missiles, there's not a single piece of evidence as to why that's a bad idea!" They throw their hands up into the air and collapse onto the bed. They make no attempt at hiding the bleakness in their voice. "Moving on... now don't..don't get upset." They begin cautiously. Oh no. "So these missiles? The area they're kept in may or may not have been in the glowing sea-" 

Oh fuck no, "What? You went into the green sea? Do you know how quickly the radiation there could kill you?" 

"I know, I know! We were wearing Power armour, it was fine Maccy. Not a single hint of rad poisoning. Now calm down and let me continue." They shot him a pointed look that showed that they weren't interested in hearing his complaints. If Sole says they're okay then they're fine but just their word isn't helping to fix the knotting feeling in his stomach. He swallows his words and crosses his arms, leaning back down onto the door. "Remember before when we took out Kellogg and learnt that if we wanted access to the institute we'd have to find Virgil?" MacCready nods slowly. "Well.. guess who found him?" They say triumphantly. Cready can't help the selfish thought of 'Why wasn't I with you when you found it' that passes through his head but pushes it down and looks at Sole in anticipation.

"What did he say?"

"It took a bit of negotiating to get the information out of him and even then he didn't have all that much except for the fact that we're going to need to hunt down a courser and then built ourselves a nice big transporter. Right. Inside. The Institute." They sit up, "We're so close Mac. So close. Just this final step and finally I'll get Shaun back." They turn their face towards him. Tears are beginning to form in them and they bite their lip. "After so long I'm finally going to have my Shaun back." 

MacCready doesn't know what to say. He knows exactly how Sole's feeling. He felt it too when that guy had given him the codes he needed to get the cure for Duncan. The hope and excitement after finally finding something that can help. But he can't think of a single thing to say to them, instead he pushes away from the door and pulls Sole into a tight hug. It's slightly uncomfortable considering the weird angle MacCready is at, bending down to reach where Sole is lying down. Sole's arms hold him just as tightly as they duck their head into his shoulder shuddering in his arms. Laughing.  
Long enough passes for Cready's back to begin aching but he doesn't pull away, not until Sole want's him to. However Sole probably feels the tension building up in his muscles there from how tightly they were holdings onto him and pulls back, still holding him close but not as flush against them as before. They beam at him. 

The scar in Sole's cheek looks jagged and rough. It's healed up now but the scar is there forever. Sole had at first been annoyed by it and considered going to facial reconstruction in Diamond city although it added an extra bonus to intimidating so they managed to deal with it. MacCready never really saw the problem with the scar. Sure it was large and took away the smoothness from that side of their face but it was never ugly. Maybe he was just biased, Sole had gotten that scar helping him for no reason other than he needed the help. It was a reminder to him that he'd repay that debt of theirs no matter what it took. Besides the scar didn't mess up anything other than their cheek. So although they may see it as a flaw the rest of them was without any doubt gorgeous.   
Right now? The way their lips tugged upwards at the ends, teeth visible with their enormous smile. That was the best looking thing about them right now. The only bad thing about it is how contagious their smiles were when that joyful.   
He feels the strong desire to kiss them, to close this small gap between the two. The feel of their breath urging him on. But he pulls back, widening the space. 

"Whenever your ready," He begins, his voice low but full of determination, "and if you ever need my help, don't hesitate to come and get me. I'll do whatever you need me to... no matter what. I'll help you get your son back." 

Sole chuckles softly, "How does tomorrow morning sound?" They smirk.

He shrugs, "Sounds perfect." 

"Thank you." They say sincerely. "You've done so much for me.." 

"No where near as much as you, Sole. No thanks necessary."

They nod. "So when we set off, we're going to have to make a quick detour, need to check in on Danse. That okay with you?"

"Sure thing." Not really. He still feel uncomfortable being in the same room as the two of them but he did bring Sole back from the glowing sea so he's got to give the guy some credit. "Is something up?" 

"Well, the reason why it took so long for me to make my way back is 'cause, turns out, Danse is a synth. Did I mention the Brotherhood are asshole? 'Cause they gave  _me_ the order of killing him because of it. Crazy shit, wish you were there. Actually I wanted you to be there but everything was happening pretty damn quickly and I didn't have the time to run here and drag your ass with me. Major hunt to find where Danse has ran off to and then talk him out of wanting to be executed. Elder Maxon's a dick." Their smile dies down and is replaced with a minor snarl.

"Wait." Cready holds up a hand, "Danse is... a synth?"

"Crazy I know right? He is the thing he hates most in the world. Really depressing actually and that's why before heading out and getting a courser chip I'd like to drop by where he's decided to live for now and make sure he's doing alright." 

"Uh,  okay?" Cready says, blinking. A synth? Damn, never would have guessed it. MacCready almost feels bad for him considering his life revolved around wiping out synths and the Institute. Almost. 

Sole scoffs at him and grabs his hand, pulling in down so they can kiss his cheek. He wills himself not to blush. "You should see yourself sometimes when you're deeply thinking about something. It's actually pretty cute." They wink at him and well there goes his efforts to not blush. "But I'm seriously exhausted right now so I'mma sleep, feel free to join me since this is your room and I feel bad for stealing it."

"That's the first time you've ever felt bad for stealing something." 

"Then you understand that this must truly pain me." They check the time on their pip-boy and lies down, their hand still holding Cready's. "It's nine pm. I suggest sleeping now if it's going to be an early morning again so either leave and do whatever or shut up and hop in." They meet MacCready's eyes and holds up the blanket, inviting him to get under it. After winter started they'd begun sharing sleeping bags to help keep warm during the night so there's nothing odd about the sleeping arrangement anymore. That being said MacCready still hesitates a moment before climbing into the bed with them. "Meaningful conversation time?" Sole mutters the question tiredly. 

"What?" Cready asks, focusing mostly on getting comfortable.

"I'm going to take that as a 'go for it'. Hope it doesn't.. weird you out too much. Sharing a bed like this. It's just that.. it get's lonely sometimes, doesn't it? Sleeping alone. Although I can't speak for both of us of course, but for me I sometimes miss having someone else close to me while I sleep. Makes me feel safer I guess? Weird being married and having your life planned out only to have that ripped away." Sole sighs and Cready waits patiently for them to continue. "What' I'm trying to get at in a really long winded way is that I hope this doesn't make you uncomfortable. I..I really need someone right now in my life. Someone like you. Who's always there for me and makes me feel safe. I seriously missed your grumpy ass after spending a full twenty four hours with the tin can. Take that how you will. Felt like you should know why I keep dragging you into these situations. And now with the chance of finally finding Shaun I....I." 

"Hey, Sole, it's fine." MacCready says soothingly, it's rare that Sole ever shows any form of vulnerability but as time had passed and they became closer, those moments became more often. He had no problem with being there for them when they needed someone to talk to or to even be close to. "I don't mind at all. I get it. But in fairness, having to spend that long with him would maked anyone wish for a Deathclaw as company instead." The two snigger at the thought. Sole hits his arm gently and gives out to him for being so cruel but MacCready defends himself insisting that it's true. Sole glares half-heartedly at him but brings themself closer to him, places their head on his chest. He moves him arm so it's around Sole's back. They mumble something but he doesn't hear what it is. 

"What did you say?" He asks.

They lift up their head and repeat themself, "You're a dick." Ah yes. What else did he expect. He rolls his eyes and sighs.

Sole was right, it does get lonely sometimes. There are nights when he wishes Lucy was there and while there are still nights like that, he's welcome to having Sole take up that spot instead. He knows Lucy would never be mad at him for moving on. He'll always love her, that's a fact, but if Sole would allow it, he could love them too. The thought leaves a faint smile on his lips as he drifts asleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel kind of terrible over how short this chapter was but for the next few I already know how it's going to play out so they should be longer and come out sooner. Hopefully...  
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay back on track with proper chapters and continuing the storyline, yay!  
> Hope you enjoy, feedback is definitely welcomed so feel free to leave a comment.

It takes weeks. Weeks of non-stop work on top of little sleep. There's barely a spot on Sole's hand that doesn't have blisters on it from all the work they've done. But as they stand back and finally get to look at the results of their labour it's with immense pride. Sure, it took weeks and Sole is utterly exhausted after it all and yet it was all worth it.  
Finally, after so long, Sole has a way of entering the institute. A way to see Shaun again. 

Every part of their mind is screaming at them to wait, to sleep, eat, maybe even relax for at least an hour or two although when Sole watches Sturges give the transporter a test start-up rational thinking goes completely out the window. It's a one in a life-time chance. No one else in the entire commonwealth has been able to infiltrate the institute and after today no one else probably ever will. Besides, now that they have the option of setting off whenever they're ready there's no way they could sit around idly.   
They fidget on the spot, studying the machine as it kicks into life. Like hell they're going to wait another second out here. They take a step forward towards the platform that they will have to stand on in a minute however the can't bring themself to take another. What if the transporter doesn't work? What do they do if they're teleported somewhere far far away from the commonwealth out in the middle of nowhere, also away from the institute. Why are they trusting Virgil? He used to work with the Institute, what's stopping him from trying to sabotage Sole who wants access to their secret base? Just because he apparently escaped doesn't mean he's entirely trustworthy. There's also a much too high chance that the machine could explode when trying to transport them, or maybe they'll end up lodged in some solid rock and will be instantly killed, not to mention they could end up without a limb or two if they do manage to appear in the Institute alive. So much could go wrong. Using this could end in disaster... Is it a risk they're willing to take? Is it certain that they'll even manage to find Shaun if they arrive, definite that he'll be alive?   
There's far too many uncertainties, but Sole isn't going to give up and cower away after everything they've done for this chance. They're terrified, yes, but if they die, they die. If they find Shaun, they find Shaun. There's only one way to find out. 

A warm hand is placed over Sole's shoulder and they tear their eyes away from the transporter to find the owner. MacCready smiles reassuringly at them, "It'll all be fine, Sole." They returns the smile and lets out a shaky breath. The original plan was to try and have him come along with Sole as backup in the event that the moment they set foot on Institute ground they'd be attacked however that wasn't a possibility. He tried to show no indication that he minded, telling Sole that there was no doubt they would be able to hold their own in that situation, but Sole noticed the worry underlining his words. "I'm sure you'll find Shaun, no problem."

"Hopefully." Is all Sole can muster. They turn their attention back to the panel where Struges is setting up.. whatever it is he needs to. He throws a thumb up at them and calls out that everything's set to go whenever Sole is. "This is it then." They mutter under their breath. As terrible as it sounds being the original test run of this, the many scenarios in which they die being a very real threat, Sole pushes all of that away and focuses on Shaun. They avenged their spouse. Now it's time to get their son back. How hard will this be?  
Sole fixes the straps of their backpack so they sit better on their shoulders and take a deep breath. "I guess this is goodbye. For now." Their voice is steady. 

"You sure you want to leave straight away? That isn't a great idea Sole, you haven't slept properly in weeks."

"As if I'm going to sleep now with this waiting for me. It'll be fine, don't be a worrywort."

"A what?"

"Forget it. Look just before I go... " They take one of MacCready's hands and holds it with both of theirs. "I want you to promise me something."

"That's never good-"

"Promise me. I want you to... if I don't come back- Now don't start furrowing brows, relax, there's only a very slim chance of that happening but if it does I want you to take care of Dogmeat for me. Besides have a trained dog by your side would severely heighten your chances of getting more merc jobs, trust me. It looks cool." Even though Dogmeat is kept as a guard dog in Sanctuary, Sole considers them as family at this point and since Cready gave them his wooden soldier toy it's only fair in exchange. Dogmeat was there when they first arrived in this new world and protected them until they began to learn how to handle themself. They trust him to look after the dog if they don't survive whatever happens next and if he doesn't, Dogmeat will probably just come back here so Preston can. 

"You're going to come back." He says seriously. 

"Yeah, I know but if I don't," They take back their hands and hold up their little finger," promise me?"

He stares at their hand, brows still furrowed, and then at them, "You are coming back, I don't care what you say. But fine," He takes their finger with him," I promise." 

Their face erupts into joy and pulls him in for a tight hug that only lasts for a few seconds. "I'm gonna miss your grumpy ass while I'm in there. It'll be weird without you making some sort of commentary about everything."

"Hah hah." He laughs sarcastically. A moment of silence fall between the two before MacCready sighs slightly. "Good luck in there. I'm sorry I can't come with you."

"Wish you could too but.. c'est la vie. Guess I should probably head out now, can't keep the institute waiting." The give his shoulder a squeeze and walks over to the platform, waiting for Sturges to give the go ahead. When they step onto it, the glance over the many faces that have gathered around to watch them leave, either to wave goodbye or out of curiosity. 

The seconds that pass feel like hours before a blue light envelopes them as a single thought passes through their mind, "Here goes nothing."

 

~~~

 

 _Days_. It's been fucking six days since Sole left. Since Sole was sent into the Institute,  _alone._ He should've went with them. Should've would've could've. But fuck if MacCready isn't losing his goddamn mind sitting around and waiting. He doesn't even know what he's waiting for anymore, for them to walk through the front door of their old house that he's currently been living in these past few days? It's been six days. It shouldn't have taken that long, it was an in and out job. Get in, find Shaun, get out. So why the hell are they not back yet?   
  
MacCready paces around the house, his thoughts running wild as he brings the bottle of Ale back up to his lips. What if they're injured, or... worse. What if they made it back out of the Institute but was attacked by Super mutants or ghouls? What if they're sitting on the side of a road bleeding out? Dying. Fuck. Maybe they got captured by the synths in the Institute, being tortured. Dead. Who can say they ever took a single step inside the Institute, they could've died in that Molecular ray.   
Preston has came to talk to MacCready after day three when he stopped leaving the house, 'to check on him', he had said. 'See how he was doing'. How did Preston think he was doing? It's been six days and all MacCready's been doing is sitting in this same building drinking till he passes out. So of course he's doing just peachy.

How could Sole be gone this long, how far away is the Institute? Surely they'd be operating in the Commonwealth to easily distribute the synths and yet they've been gone for six days and MacCready can't bare the wait any longer. It's almost a week. Shit, what will he do if they don't come back? Take their goddamn dog and do what? He hasn't done mercenary work for anyone other than Sole in months. Hancock would let him set up his business in the third rail again but whoever hires him... they won't be Sole and MacCready isn't sure he could handle that, having to go back to having no one to rely on. Having someone he cared about in his life ripped away again. At least when he lost Lucy he knew she was gone, he saw her die there were no is she isn't she. But now Sole's disappeared and MacCready's life is falling apart all over again. At this point he'd rather just see Sole's dead body lying at the front door than to never see them again.

He runs both his hands through his hair. When Sole went to the glowing sea with Danse, well, there wasn't a need to be worried. They had Danse to watch their back. He knew they'd be fine, his only problem was boredom. However in this moment he wishes he could be only bored. If Sole hadn't come back that day with Danse then he easily could have spoken to the Brotherhood and found out where they were or if they were okay, when it comes to the institute he doesn't have the luxury. MacCready resists the urge to slam his fist into the nearest wall, frustration building up. Everything would be a lot easier if he knew _where the hell they were_ so that maybe he could go to them and see if they're alright. Offer them some help. But no they had to vanish into thin air and leave him behind like this. 

He'll give them a few more days. After that he'll have to move on, no point getting alcohol poisoning out here, and he'll bring dogmeat with him. Probably go back to Goodneighbour, pick up some new jobs. MacCready slumps down onto the couch as he eyelids feel heavy.

He'll have to move on.

 

~~~

 

Three more days pass and MacCready? He's packing up his belongings. He's decided that he's going to head out in the morning and when the trader came earlier on that day he stocked up on ammo and other necessities along with whatever the hell a dog needs. Are dogs even allowed in The third rail? He'll figure something out.   
MacCready's sat and waited for over a week, if Sole was going to come back they would've already, there's no reason for them to be taking this long if they were still alive. He's spent enough nights trying to ignore that fact however he can't any longer. There's no caps to be made by sitting around on his ass so it's time to get up and start working again. There's a bitter taste in his mouth but he swallows it down and tries to forget all the negative thoughts swirling through his mind. He could scream and cry all he wanted but nothing would change. It's not like he hasn't gone through this song and dance before and while he misses Lucy dearly he still got up and continued with his life. Just like then he still has his son to look after, who's now healthy. Cready had wanted Duncan to meet Sole so he knew who had saved his life when his own father couldn't but that apparently won't be happening. 

He rubs his chin, thinking about what else he'll need for his journey, feeling the scruffy beard appearing there. Food? Check. Bullets? Check. Bunch of other shit? Check. As he goes through his mental checklists there's a knock on the door, most likely Preston trying to get him to stay for another few days. How that man can manage to believe that Sole will be coming back is beyond MacCready. There's no point in deluding  yourself, it only hurts worse as more time drags by. Cready considers ignoring Preston but the knocking continues. He lets out a long groan and opens the door.

"What." He deadpans. In the doorway stands Preston, looking strangely excited over something. Doubtful it'll be anything of any interest to MacCready. 

"They're back." Cready feels his heart miss a beat. They are? Wait, who's they.

"Who's back?" He asks, suddenly a helluva lot more interested in what Garvey has to tell him. Preston shakes his head at him. 

"Sole. Some of the settlers up near croup manor said they saw them walking around with some other person. No one knew who he was but they were definite Sole was with him." Cready only stares at him. He can't believe what he's hearing. Sole's alive? They made it out of the Institute... Was the man they were with their son?   
At his silence Preston continues, "That was a couple days ago apparently so I can't say where they are right this second but having someone see them alive and well is great and I thought you'd like to know." Cready only manages to nod, his voice continuing to fail him. A couple days ago. They could be on their way back as they speak. Preston puts a reassuring hand on his shoulder and begins to walk away. While MacCready thinks he's an idiot for the goal he's trying to achieve, there's no way you can protect others in this wasteland and there's no caps involved in the work, however he appreciates that he tries to help and have a positive outlook on the world. He's not a bad guy and this past while he's tried to help MacCready just as often as other settlements all over the commonwealth and for that he's thankful.

"Hey Garv." He calls out, catching Preston's attention. He stops and look back at Cready. "Guess you're right... Maybe I should hang around for another day." 

He nods understandingly, a faint smile on his lips, gentle. Almost as though he knows how much Sole means to MacCready. "I'll tell you as soon as I hear more. Get some sleep, okay?"

Cready nods and he means it. Tonight he feels like it'll be the first night he will be able to sleep, easily and without any of the nightmares that had become all too common the past nights. He closes the front door and slouches against it, small laughs bubbling up into his mouth. Alive. They're alive. 

 

~~~

 

It's still dark outside and MacCready guesses it's around three am although none of that stops him from being awakened from his slumber by some bright blue light. He darts upwards on the tattered couch, hands reaching out instinctively to grab his sniper rifle. Gingerly making his way towards a gap left in the wall he peers out of it to try and spot the source of the light. His eyes scan the darkness, looking for any abnormalities. His eyes fall on a silhouette, crouched in the middle of the street,  back turned to MacCready. Could it be?  
He tightens his grip on his rifle and sneaks out of the house, he observes the figure for a moment. Whoever or whatever it is isn't moving, their arms appear to be holding themself. MacCready gulps and speaks up. 

"Who are you?" He demands. A strange light and then a person. It all barely makes sense to him and for all he knows he could be hallucinating or dreaming. Even so, doesn't hurt to ask.

The figure perks up slightly at his voice, back straightening. He steps closer slowly and silently, the nearer he gets the more audible the shuddering breath of whoever this is becomes. Their head turns slightly to the side, just enough for him to see their mouth tilt up into a smirk, "That anyway to greet an old friend?" They rasp out. 

The rifle falls to ground and he takes the final steps towards Sole, dropping to his knees next to them. In the dim light it's hard to see anything but he does his best to inspect them for any wounds. "Calm down Mac, I'm fine." They protest weakly, placing a hand on his chest. He gives them a look that tells them that he doesn't believe them. Despite how small their voice is, MacCready can't see any physical damage or any cause for concern other than how lifeless they sound.

"I'm fine." They repeat a lot sterner this time. Sole rubs at their eyes and lets out a long sigh. The stand up straighter, shakily, and so Cready helps them steady themself. There's so much he wants to say, so many thoughts fighting to be said aloud and yet he can't find it in himself to open his mouth and say it. It's all so sudden, so out of the blue, catching him off guard. There's no sign of anyone else rushing out to see what that light was, only the two of them standing in the street, silent if not for the humming of the turrets protecting them as they sleep.   
There's something off about Sole and MacCready will be damned if he doesn't find out however now isn't the time to begin forcing them to talk. The fact that Shaun doesn't appear to be with them a major red flag.

"Do you.... want to lie down?" He asks hesitantly. Sole nods. Together they walk back into the house, MacCready offering them support, leading Sole into the master bedroom. He hadn't once slept on the bed while living in their house and so the sheets were left untouched until Sole flopped down onto them with a tired yawn.

"Sole.." He begins, "What... Are you okay?" 

Sole shuts their eyes and runs a hand through their hair, "We need to talk. Not now, sorry, but in the morning."  He simply nods. Damn right they need to talk. He starts walking out of the room when Sole turns on the bed to face him. "Cready. How long was I gone for?"

He stares at them, confused. "You don't remember?" 

"More like didn't pay attention." They attempt to smile at him but it comes across as forced instead of carefree like usual. It makes his heart wrench. What the hell happened when they were gone?

"A little over a week." He answers them trying to keep his emotions at a minimum.

"Oh." Yeah, fucking 'oh'. "Well, goodnight then MacCready." 

 _MacCready_. In all his time with Sole he doesn't think there's been a moment when they've said his name. It's always some variation of it or some other nickname they had thought up. He starts a little at the sound of it but recovers.

"Night." He closes the door to the room that Sole had replaced a while ago and returns to the couch. He slouches down onto it knowing that attempting to sleep would be futile and turns on the television placed in front of it. While it's useless in terms of getting any form of entertainment it's a great source of light when he doesn't want to turn on the main bulbs.  
He sits and stares into the 'Please stand by' message on the television and tries to think of exactly what the fuck just happened. First the blue light, the same one that was seen when Sole went to the Institute... meaning they must've been teleported like that back again. He's mentioned time and time again about how him and science stuff don't go together but even he can tell that Sole would've had to have found another Molecular Ray inside the Institute in order to come back. Which brings up the question of how did they reach that Ray if they were seen in the Commonwealth near that settlement only a few days ago? And they had someone with them at that point but they don't right now. None of this makes any sense. Gone for so long only to come back as a shell of themself, all life drained from them. Even at the harshest stages of exhaustion MacCready has never seen Sole like this before. 

MacCready holds his head in his hands and, to his own surprise, wishes that all of this is only a dream. Wishes that Sole hasn't returned yet and he'll wake up wondering when they'll walk over that bridge, Shaun alongside them. With any luck all of tonight could've been a terrible dream just like every night before and he'll wake up with another shitty hangover.

"I need a cigarette.." He mumbles to himself, pulling out a packet from one of his many pockets.

"You know those things are bad for you, right?" MacCready's head snaps around towards the voice behind him, dropping the packet. In the hallway is Sole, leaning against the wall with their arms crossed. Their face is entirely neutral. "Usually there's campaigning about how 'smoking kills' and whatnot but you don't see that so much anymore."

"What are you doing up?" 

Sole lets out a long breath, not quite a sigh and clicks their tongue, "Didn't feel like sleeping." They answer him truthfully.

"Sole." MacCready says warningly, getting up off the couch. "I have.. no idea what you've been through this past while but you should sleep. You look terrible." 

"Flattering as always." 

"I mean it."

"I'm sure you do, Creads." They don't move an inch. "I'm not really feeling up to sleeping right now, figured I'd go for a walk or something so you can go back to.. whatever you're doing." They make a vague gesture to the couch where he was sitting earlier. 

"Going for a walk? Are you crazy? Sole it's the middle of the night."

"Exactly. It's the most peaceful time." The monotone in their voice is worrying Cready more and more. 

"It's  _dark_ out. Anything could attack you if you're on your own. Do you want to die?" he poses the question as more of a joke but the look Sole gives him in return makes him shut his mouth. 

"Might do some good. Going out. Get some fresh air. Clear my mind a bit."

"I can't let you go alone." He takes a step towards Sole and conveys with his eyes that he'll do everything to stop them leaving on their own into the darkness. He's not about to let Sole do something stupid. Granted that's all they ever do... but in those other moments of stupidity they tend to have backup. 

"Need I remind you that up until recently," Sole pushes themself off the wall and steps closer to MacCready, a small gap separating the two. " you got your orders from me. Did only as you were told. You don't magically get the ability to order  _me_ around just because I've stopped paying you to follow those orders." There's a harshness in Sole's voice that Cready has heard before whenever they attempt to intimidate someone. Being on the receiving end of it he now understands why it works so well although he doesn't back down, meeting their eyes. Being this close he can see the dark bags from lack of sleep and a wild desperation. 

He keeps him mouth shut and doesn't move out of the way, blocking them from the front door. There's something not right about Sole and he's not about to let them go wandering around the commonwealth by themself. He might have before but they seemed awfully serious when he asked if they wanted to die. If Sole's not in a good place right now then he isn't going to let them do anything that could end up being lethal to them. If they want to leave so badly then they're going to have to try a lot harder than intimidation on him. Sure, they could kick his ass, no doubt, but they wouldn't. 

"MacCready. Move." The harsh tone that earlier possessed is gone but they refuse to relent. When he doesn't reply or show any sign of moving, Sole let's out a low growl and throws their hand into the air. "Fine! You can come with me if that's what it'll take to make you so fucking happy. Just let me get away from this damned house or so help me God because I cannot stand another minute being here!"

"Woah, hey calm down." 

"Don't you dare tell me to calm down." They snarl at him. "I've had the shittiest week that's been attached onto the shittiest year of my entire life and I went to law school. So you don't get to tell me to calm down." Sole shuts their eyes and takes a deep breath. When the speak again it's at a much lower volume, "All I want... is to leave this place, leave Sanctuary. I-I can't _handle_ being this close to... all of this." A pause. "I don't want to think about anything from the past, Maccy. I can't." 

MacCready gently holds Sole by their shoulders and steers them towards the door. "C'mon, let's get you out of here then." As he moves with Sole he picks up his backpack and rifle, Sole's already wearing theirs. "Where do you want to go?" He asks as they walk to the entrance of Sanctuary.

"Anywhere but here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeaaaah, when I was playing fallout I thought a lot about how Sole would react to everything that happened in the Institute especially since I joined every faction so this is the kind of breakdown I'd expect them to have. Oops.  
> Also in this fanfic Sole both went to law school and fought in the army, they finished their degree before they fought in the war.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I'm pretty terrible... sorry this took me so long to update ahh! I don't even have an excuse I just left this for way longer than I meant to. This is only a short-ish chapter since I really wanted to get an update out for this after having left it for ages... Enjoy!

The duo walk in silence for the most part other than the stray comment about their surroundings every now and then, mostly coming from MacCready. Sole moves sluggishly towards.. wherever they're going. They had asked the question a little while earlier after finally deciding that maybe setting a destination would be a good idea, but Cready had only told them that he had an idea of somewhere they could go. "Somewhere quiet and peaceful." He described it as.   
Sole couldn't care less and so only shrugged letting the silence fall over them again. In the back of their mind they knew they should talk to MacCready, tell him what happened but damn. Sole does not want to think about that let alone say it out loud. Not yet at least. Although at this point in time it's the only thing on their mind. Besides trying to forget about it is useless.

"Whoa, watch out!" MacCready calls from behind them and they stop just in time to see a bloatfly hover towards them, shooting it's larva at them. Sole doesn't react fast enough to fully make it out of the way and hisses slightly at the feeling of their skin burning where the larva landed on them. MacCready shoots the bug out of the air before it manages to attack them again. Sole curses under their breath at themself for not paying enough attention. The pain is near to non-existent but the fact that they couldn't dodge a simple attack wounds their pride the most. 

"You okay?" he asks, still scanning around for any other enemies that might try to jump out at them. At least one of them is paying attention. 

"Yeah." They reply through gritted teeth. "Absolutely peachy, now how much further to this 'peaceful' area you mentioned?" 

"Maybe another five or ten minutes tops."

Sole nods, "You know since you're the one who actually has a notion about where we're going why aren't you leading?" They smirk slightly, "Unless, you're eyes are more focused on a whole other location?" 

"Ha ha." Sole notes the mild blush, their smirk growing a little bigger. "You're the one that leads and I'm the one that watches your back, remember?" 

"My  _back_ sure." They can't help themself anymore, feeling their mood lift already as they continue. Sole licks their lips and steps a little closer. His eyes dart up to the sky as though silently praying for help. It makes Sole laugh a little. "Whatever you say Maccy." 

"Good to see your sense of humour has returned. I take you don't need your arm bandaged or anything?" 

"Ah-ah, don't change the subject." They're not done with teasing him just yet and frowns.

"Changing the subject?... Me? Never. There wasn't even a subject to begin with." He smirks back at them and their frown turns into a full blown pout. 

They snort and backs off, "You're no fun." Sole turns and resumes their journey along the path. The sound of MacCready chuckling makes them feel considerably better than last night. Leave it to MacCready to cheer them up. 

"You know," MacCready begins, jogging to catch up to them. Sole makes a questioning hum but startles as he grips their elbow, spinning them around to face him while his arms hold them close. He smirks confidently and speaks in a low voice, " if you're really that disappointed at having to lead all the time all you have to do is ask. I have no problem with you watching my...  _back_ if you want to so badly." Sole blinks at him, a warm sensation spreading across their face that tells them that they're definitely blushing. And brightly too. Dammit. "Two can play at this game." he winks, letting go of Sole and swiftly moves ahead. 

Meanwhile Sole...  can't comprehend what in the hell just happened. Never before has he tried to one up them like that and, sure, it wasn't the smoothest of lines but.... it leaves Sole utterly stunned.

"You coming?" He asks over his shoulder after noticing that they haven't moved yet.

"Pshh, yeah 'course." They respond as nonchalantly as possible which probably isn't all that convincing when they're blushing up a storm. It took that man six months to finally try and turn the tables on them. They move clumsily behind MacCready, even less focused on where their feet fell than before. Their mind racing with the picture of him so close to them, his voice low and sultry, the way his eyes darted downwards ever so quickly that Sole wouldn't have noticed if they were paying close enough attention. His arms warm where they held Sole.  
Sole stumbles on a twig that simply  _had_ to get in their way but catches themself before falling, swearing under their breath. MacCready glances behind him with an eyebrow arched in amusement. If they weren't red in the face before they definitely are now. As easy as it is to mess with MacCready and walk away innocently it's much harder being on the receiving end and still have functioning legs.

The two continue their journey in companionable silence for another short while until a half destroyed house can be seen in the not so far distance. MacCready informs Sole that the building is their destination. They can see what he meant by peaceful, the closer they get to the building the more they can see, such as the lake the boathouse is placed on and the missing roof, but most importantly the lack of anything that could try to kill them. Sole nods appreciatively at the area. 

"Nice place... When did you find out about it?" Sole asks MacCready, walking through the front garden.

"A job I did a while back... we stopped here for a little bit, back then there were insects infesting this house but they're all dead now. Figured you needed somewhere that allowed you to.. feel safe I guess for a even if only for short amount of time." He shrugs leaning against the door frame watching as Sole excitedly explores the first floor of the house. While it's not the most undamaged of places Sole adores it. The large rooms and sound of water hitting the outside platform. They don't check upstairs figuring that with the lack of a roof there would be no need especially since there's enough space on the floor for their sleeping bags to fit without any hassle.

"It's great." They breath out. "The perfect place to kick back and relax in for a while." For a while... soon they'll have to return to their other duties. 

MacCready notices the way Sole's face drops and hurriedly pushes himself off of the frame and ushers Sole outside. "There's even a workshop here so you can turn it into a settlement if you want... or keep it to yourself." A gentle smile slips momentarily onto his face as he says the last suggestion.

Keep this place for themself? It could work nicely as a new home. Plenty of land for farming, beautiful scenery which is rare nowadays, as well as plenty of room to decorate and add in extra workshops so they can modify their armour and weapons. They made a decisive noise. "You know what maccy I've always wanted a house by water, be it the sea or a lake not some small river. Back in my day however they kinda cost a fortune so I had to settle for the bungalow in Sanctuary. It's funny how you stumble upon your life dreams." MacCready nods unsure of what to say. Sole continues, "Thanks for bringing me here. I think this is... definitely something I needed." 

Sole knows he wants them to tell him everything and Sole does think it would be a good idea to tell him. The only problem is what it is they'd tell him. The truth would be... a lot to explain although they hate having to lie to him. Luckily for them he isn't prying so Sole decides to busy themself with their backpack for the moment leaving MacCready to stand somewhat awkwardly to the side. They rummage around trying to remember where it was they put those carrot plants and gourds. It's both a blessing and curse that they found this backpack with so many pockets since there's plenty of space for whatever they find during their travels but also makes it incredibly difficult to find anything.

"Aha." They hold up the plants triumphantly to MacCready to which he only cocks an eyebrow. Sole clicks their tongue and gestures for him to follow them into the front garden. The soil is good enough to farm on, Sole notes. Due to the settlers at the other settlements Sole never needed to lend a hand on the farms and before the war farming wasn't a job any of their family partook in. They only knew the basics such as you plant the seeds and then add water, also fertilising the soil helps... in some way. However fertilising anything seems to be out of the question nowadays. Would the brahmin make the crops even more radioactive? Huh.  
"You used to own a farm right? How does some manual labour sound to you?" Sole flashes him a cocky smirk at the innuendo in their otherwise innocent question. They're going to get payback.

He shakes his head, shrugging his duster off onto the floor along with backpack. "So long as your helping." 

"For you? Anytime." 

The rest of the day passes almost uneventfully. MacCready shows Sole the ropes, teaching them exactly how to have a successful farm. Turns out Sole isn't actually as bad at it as they were suspecting but it is pretty difficult to mess up placing seeds in some dirt. Once Sole thinks they have the hang of it they go off on their own planting the rest in silence, occasionally stopping to tell MacCready a joke that popped into their head to which he only groans at.   
It's the sort of relaxation that Sole desperately needed after recent events, a chance for them to stop for a second and just  _breath._ There's been less and less moments like that in their life ever since the bombs fell and so Sole had begun to properly appreciate them. They wipes away some sweat from their forehead. They had debated with themself whether or not to take off their many layers of armour considering the hot weather today but decided it's best to be protected. Sure it may be quiet and surprisingly tranquil now but that could all be disrupted in a matter of seconds.

From behind them MacCready let's out a long sigh. Ahh Maccy. Sole doesn't have any idea what they'd do without him. Who would have thought that they would have grown as close as they have? Sole sure as hell wouldn't and yet, somehow, they couldn't imagine their life without him. Trudging through the wasteland with Danse? Not the most appealing of ideas. If that person in the third rail hadn't told them MacCready existed Sole would have been alone with Dogmeat. Sole needs to find that guy and buy him a drink sometime. 

"Hey, you nearly finished there?" MacCready asks, wiping the dirt from his hands on his duster. Sole shoots him a look and he drops it. 

"Yeah, this is my last." 

"Great." He throws the duster over his arm and looks up at the sky. "It's getting a little late now, you want me to get a fire going for dinner?" 

"That would be amazing of you." Sole had forgotten that they haven't eaten anything of proper substance is a long time, not since they left the Institute, and their stomach grumbles loudly at the thought of a warm meal. "You can choose what we have tonight." MacCready nods and walks over to an area that they already picked out as the cooking grounds and begins lighting up the fire. Sole smiles at how entirely domestic this feels and can't resist calling over to MacCready, "Thanks sweetheart!" They hear the sound of him snorting in response. 

For the moment everything is almost perfect and Sole is going to hang onto that feeling until they've at least eaten something. Then... They'll tell him what happened.

 

~~~

 

The meal passes awkwardly. Sole ends up lost in thought throughout it as the deadline they set for themself grows closer and whenever MacCready attempts a conversation they have to ask him to repeat himself. In the end he gives up. Sole feels bad but they can't help but have their throughts race, lies upon lies rushing throughout their mind. They'll have to choose the most believable and the most foolproof situation to tell to MacCready, attempting to tell him the truth would only end up ruining everything. Although they can't only lie to him, they can't bring themself to, MacCready deserves better than that. But what could they even think of to say that's true? There's no information that they could tell him that wouldn't be a risk and wouldn't take more explaining than they'd care to do. "-ole." However if they lied about everything and he found out... "Sole." No... they can't tell him that. It's easier to stick to being vague on the details and work the emotional angle, that's something they can do no problem at this point in time. "Sole!" 

"Wha?" Sole snaps back out of their thoughts to see MacCready looking at them, obviously concerned. His hand waving in front of their face trying to get their attention, which he stops doing as soon as they meet his eyes. "Seriously, Sole, what's wrong? You've been spaced out for the past half an hour at this point." It's now or never.

Sole takes a deep breath and focuses on putting as much emotion into their voice as they can. Sure they don't have a plan per say, but things tend to work out best when they improvise. MacCready waits patiently, expecting them to start talking. "Mac..." They say finally, voice quivering slightly. "Shaun is... Shaun's dead." The last word comes out as more of a whisper and they look away from MacCready, instead focusing on the ground. "When I went up into the institute it.. took a while to find him, the real him that is. That was 'cause he wasn't there." 

"The real him?" MacCready asks. His voice is so gentle and soft that Sole feels like they want to cry, just hold onto him and forget everything that happened. They're positive that if they saw him they would burst into tears. 

"Yeah, you see when I.. appeared there, this kid was wondering around. It was Shaun. He was... grown up, just like in the memories. Just a little boy. But it wasn't... it wasn't Shaun. The boy was a synth. Turns out that... I was too late. I took too long finding all the evidence, figuring out where he was. I was too late and Shaun died all because of me." 

"Hey, hey hey no. Look at me," Sole could hear MacCready shifting and coming over next to them. They shook their head and wanted only to move on from everything that they saw in the Institute, everything they learnt. Maybe if they had been quicker... woken up earlier. "Sole, please look at me." His hand gently cupped Sole cheek and he turned their head to face his. The expression took Sole by surprise. Sometimes Sole finds it easy to forget just how young MacCready is, the rough edges to his face adding on years along with the constant frown but right now, right this second, he looks so incredibly young. His eyes are wide and full of raw emotion, the usual hard set he has to his jaw eased. The sympathy is evident on his face, a mild understanding to Sole's situation but not quite to the full extent. There's something calming about how his mouth quirks up into a tiny smile when they make eye contact.   
"Sole, listen to me, it's not your fault alright? None of this is your fault. Yes this all sucks right now but you are not to blame for it. You did all you could and worked your ass off to get this far and I know this is the worst possible outcome but hey, you're going to get through this okay? You're a survivor Sole. Out of all of those in that vault it was you who made it out and lasted longer than most vault dwellers would once you reached the surface. This is just another thing you have to survive through. I know you can." 

"What if... what if I just want to stop having to survive through everything? Maybe I just want my old life back, Maccy. I'm fed up surviving in this world, I just want to live the life I worked hard for."

"I'm sure you do, S, and I wish you could. You deserve a heck of a lot better than this but I'm afraid an atomic bomb stopped that from happening. At least now you can get a fresh start, I guess. You've already done that with your name right? Now you get to live a second life with a whole new identity and purpose." MacCready hasn't moved his hand away from Sole's face and so they lean into it slightly, a tight smile stretching their lips. "I'm really not the best at this whole, comforting thing," he continues, " but I want you to know that I'll be here for you and not just because you're my boss. Say the word and I'll do whatever you need me to."

He give them his trademark lopsided grin and Sole can feel their mouth begin to quiver. They quickly pull MacCready into a tight hug, his arms encircling around Sole holding them tight. Together they remain in an embrace as Sole let's themself cry softly into his shoulder. The weight of the previous night finally easing somewhat.Sure they might've been able to get their son back if they woke up earlier but then they never would have met MacCready. Maybe things aren't perfect but... Sole has made it this far without their family, they can make it for another while longer.


End file.
